In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sport or doing exercise classes. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

INowadays
Correct your spelling
Nowadays
in
this
Add a hyphen
fast-paced
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fast paced
Add a hyphen
fast-paced
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society and crowded schedule of
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
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hiring a personal fitness
trainer
instead
of doing exercise
on
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apply
show examples
themselves in
this
essay I will highlight of main causes of
this
perspective and it is
impact
impact
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apply
show examples
as I mentioned before , The ground is
schedule
Wrong verb form
scheduled
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a long work time
work time
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
change people to doing exercise classes at home passport Mandarina by
sport
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sports
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man
trainer
rather than going to
gym
Add an article
the gym
show examples
Furthermore
for
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apply
show examples
this
perspective is security purpose
for instance
some
of
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apply
show examples
businessman
an
Correct your spelling
and
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influencer
hiring
Wrong verb form
hire
show examples
a bodyguard
for
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to
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protect
them
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
Correct your spelling
personally
personallyAre
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personally
there’s valuable items
such
as home houses jewelries and even their families
when
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
other hand
this
perspective has a positive
impact
on the
trainer
which increase his salary anger is more opportunity for jobs the sport classes and gyms Get a negative
impact
because of reduce the members who attended it Anything conclusion in conclusion any person
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
a specific purpose of attending sports classes for hiring
fitness
Correct article usage
a fitness
show examples
trainer
but not forget that each of them
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
positive and negative development What are the reasons for
this
? Is
this
a positive or a negative development?
Submitted by enasawad68 on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
You need to provide more specific and relevant examples to support your main points. Try to provide concrete examples and evidence to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Your essay does not fully address the prompt. Make sure to discuss both the reasons for hiring a personal fitness trainer and whether it is a positive or negative development.
lexical resource
Your essay lacks a range of vocabulary and uses repetitive language. Try to use a variety of words and phrases to make your writing more interesting and sophisticated.
grammatical range
There are several grammatical errors in your essay, including incorrect sentence structures and verb tense inconsistencies. Proofread your essay carefully to correct these errors.

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fitness
  • Health
  • Personalized
  • Effective
  • Workout routines
  • Motivation
  • Guidance
  • Busy schedules
  • Limited time
  • One-on-one training
  • Qualified
  • Experienced
  • Overall well-being
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