In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation

In several countries, ordinary people crave to buy their own

house

instead

of leasing a flat. There are some reasons for the increasing desire for

house

possession that will be discussed in

this

essay. In my point of view,

this

is a positive situation for the citizens to buy a home rather than rent one. It is believable why citizens in some nations want to buy accommodation rather than rent one. Many people think the houses which they buy are more materialistic. They think those who cannot afford to buy a flat have to resort to renting a

house

for themselves.

Additionally

, owning a

house

brings a sense of security. If leasing a

house

, the landlord won’t worry about paying the renting fee during the financial collapse.

Thirdly

, I think buying a flat can be a lucrative investment because we can use the remaining money after buying the

house

to invest in other kinds of stuff like education, food, entertainment… In conclusion, I attribute the desire to buy a flat rather than renting a

house

for long-term investment or a wish for stable living conditions.

However

, I suppose that

this

trend is more positive than negative

due to

its big investment.

Submitted by kimhoa01679396246 on Sun Nov 05 2023

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task response

Your essay partially addresses the task, but it lacks a clear and comprehensive discussion of the reasons why owning a home is important. Make sure to provide more specific details and examples to support your ideas.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is somewhat unclear. Ensure that your ideas are properly linked and organized to enhance the overall coherence and cohesion of your essay.

lexical resource

Your use of vocabulary and lexical resources is satisfactory, but there is room for improvement. Consider using a wider range of vocabulary and incorporating more specific and precise terms to enhance the clarity and effectiveness of your essay.

grammatical range

There are several grammatical errors throughout your essay. Take note of your sentence structure and grammar usage to ensure a more accurate and coherent expression of your ideas.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

201 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

ownership
renting
importance
sense of security
stability
financial investment
asset
customize
decorate
belonging
community
potential
future generations
long-term
cost advantage
control
living space

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In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

While recruiting a new employee, the employer should pay more attantion to their personal qualities, rather than qualifications and experience. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

you recently organised an all day meeting for your company, which look place in a local hotel. In their feedback, participants at the meeting said that they liked the hotel, but they were unhppy about the food that was served for lunch. write a letter to the manger of the hotel.

In some countries, the government pays unemployed people on a weekly basis. How does this impact individuals and the government? Do you agree or disagree with this idea?

Some people think that they have the right to use as much as fresh water they want, others believe government should control the use of water as it limited sources. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The diagram below shows the process of making a violin by hand. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.