IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the result of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.

The chart below shows the result of a survey about people's coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.
#survey #people #coffee #tea #habits #five #australian #cities
The given bar graph illustrates
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
data on
people
 who have
coffee
routine
Fix the agreement mistake
routines
show examples
 in 5 different Australian cities. The number of
people
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 displayed in percentages.
Overall
,
it is clear that
, in three cities, namely Sydney,Melbourne and Hobart, going to
cafe
Correct article usage
a cafe
show examples
 itself has been more
preffered
Correct your spelling
preferred
. Taking a closer look
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
detailes
Correct your spelling
details
, In Sydney over 60% of
people
 went to any
cafe
 shops around for drinking.
However
, roughly half of
people
Add an article
the people
show examples
 bought instant
coffee
last
 month
while
 44% of them got a fresh one. More or less indicators were followed in
melbourne
Change the capitalization
Melbourne
show examples
 and Hobart as they were in Sydney.
In addition
 in both cities, Melbourne and Hobart, almost 65
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
people
 enjoyed their drink in a
cafe
. By
compare
Change the form of the verb
comparing
show examples
 them, Brisbane's and Adelaide's citizens' preference was a bit different.
Number
Change the article
A number
The number
show examples
 of
people
 who drank fresh
coffee
 was 34% which
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 the least
indicators
Fix the agreement mistake
indicator
show examples
 on
given
Correct article usage
the given
show examples
 graph. In Adelaide, half of
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 bought instant
coffee
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
even
left
Wrong verb form
leaving
show examples
 behind
cafe
 shop lovers.
Submitted by tukezaliyeva96 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words people, coffee, cafe with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumption
  • preference
  • beverage
  • caffeine
  • demographics
  • trend
  • survey
  • cultural significance
  • habit
  • seasonal variation
  • health consciousness
  • availability
  • implications
  • urban vs. rural consumption
  • data interpretation
  • quantitative analysis
  • fluctuations
  • patterns
  • peak times
  • economical impact
What to do next:
Look at other essays: