Today, many people do not know their neighbours in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this?

Nowadays, people hardly socialize with their next-door families in a metropolis. The major reason for
this
is the busy life of individuals caused by economic problems they tackle , yet it can be solved by communal activities. The main cause of problems is the busy lives men and women must deal with every day. These days, individuals must work hard in order to have enough money to afford the expensive costs of living in large cities.
For instance
, employees in Ha Noi city might have a nine-to-five work so that they can earn high revenue.
Moreover
, congestion in a big city
also
Add a missing verb
is also
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a challenging factor. Take Ho Chi Minh City as an example, there are always traffic jams in metropolitan, especially during rush hours which make individuals stuck in traffic and spend most of their time socialising with each other.
As a result
, they have no energy to communicate on weekdays and at the weekend they only want to take a rest to regain energy for the next week.
However
, the solution can be found in local rights to make free hours. Each country has its own traditional event nations. By
celebrate
Wrong verb form
celebrating
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those events,
residential
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residents
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can be connected to each other.
For example
, if they want to organise an event, they must communicate to find out the most effective way.
In addition
, their relationships will be better and they
also
can strike up with their neighbours during an event.
To sum up
, economic situations and bustling lives are caused by society’s limited time to know the next-door families. But there are some suggested ways to solve it
such
as communal activities.
Submitted by zky1705202 on

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task response
The essay responds adequately to the task, addressing both the problems caused by not knowing neighbors and suggesting a solution. However, more specific examples and illustrations could be included to strengthen the clarity and comprehensiveness of the ideas.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a clear logical structure, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, the introduction could be more engaging to grab the reader's attention.
lexical resource
The essay shows a satisfactory range of vocabulary and the use of some appropriate phrases. However, more varied and sophisticated vocabulary could be utilized to enhance the lexical resource.
grammatical range
The essay displays a good command of grammar, with mostly accurate and appropriate sentence structures. However, there are some minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that can be improved.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Community spirit
  • Isolation
  • Surveillance
  • Safety and security
  • Vulnerability
  • Support networks
  • Local gatherings
  • Foster
  • Social media platforms
  • Neighbourhood watch
  • Emergency situations
  • Natural disasters
  • Shared resources
  • Crime rates
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