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Band 5

Today, many people do not know their neighbors in large cities. What problem does this cause? What can be done about this?

#people #neighbors #cities
It is true that many individuals who live in metropolitan cities do not recognize their
neighbors
Change the spelling
neighbours
show examples
. The root cause for
this
 is the
lack
 of
sense
 of
community
 and having a hectic lifestyle, yet it can be solved by creating shared
spaces
 in the
neighborhood
Change the spelling
neighbourhood
show examples
. The prime reason for not caring about next-door
people
 is their hectic lifestyles.
Due to
 the fact that, in a big city, the pace of
life
 is as fast as
rocket
Add an article
a rocket
show examples
 and
people
 have to do all activities as they can to earn living costs.
As a result
,
people
 will not have
mind
Add an article
a mind
the mind
show examples
 to find out what
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 going on with
neighbors
Change the spelling
neighbours
show examples
 and communicate with them. Take Ho Chi Minh City in Vietnam as an example, the citizens wake up
so
Rephrase
apply
show examples
early every day to go to work until
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
midnight. Some of them do not have
opportunity
Correct article usage
the opportunity
show examples
 to communicate with relatives at home and in truth, there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 a few
people
 has
intimate
Add an article
an intimate
show examples
 connection with other
neighbors
Change the spelling
neighbours
show examples
.
Besides
 that, it should be
gasped
Correct your spelling
grasped
show examples
 that
sense
 of
community
 has a significant impact on
people
’s lives. Now, the
lack
 of
sense
 of
community
 in society is becoming more considerable.
This
 is because
people
 think that their own benefits are more vital than
of
Correct pronoun usage
those of
show examples
 the
community
 and they do not want to share their properties
for
Change preposition
with
show examples
 others around them.
As a consequence
, they do not have any information about their
neighbors
Change the spelling
neighbours
show examples
 and it can lead to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
lack
 of communication with other
people
. Take Shanghai of China as
example
Add an article
an example
show examples
,
people
 live
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
there,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
only do their work and
not
Add a missing verb
do not
show examples
take their
Verb problem
pay
show examples
 attention
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the neighborhood. The most productive measure for
this
 problem is creating shared
spaces
 for everyone in
neighborhood
Add an article
the neighborhood
show examples
. It should be appreciated that
people
 can sit and talk to each other about some new's in
life
 and share
life
's experiences.
As a result
, all
people
 can have a relaxing time after a busy day
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
full of exhaustion.
Furthermore
, they
also
 collect more experiences which can help them enhance
life
. In Los Angeles, there are many coffee shops and clubs which create more opportunities for
people
speak
Fix the infinitive
to speak
show examples
 to others and have more relationships.
Therefore
,
people
 should
creating
Change the verb form
create
be creating
show examples
 some shared
spaces
 to connect to their
neighbors
.
To sum up
,
it is clear that
 some individuals do not recognise their next-door
people
 currently in
mega cities
Correct your spelling
megacities
show examples
 are the major catalyst for their eventful lifestyle and the
lack
 of
sense
 of
community
. The strongest method for
this
 problem is opening sharing
spaces
 for all
people
.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • sense of community
  • isolation
  • loneliness
  • support network
  • sense of security
  • trust
  • cooperation
  • social support
  • integration
  • community events
  • shared spaces
  • neighborly interactions
  • neighborhood watch programs
  • community engagement
  • technology
  • connect
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