It is better for students to study forme home rather than go to school.Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
I believe
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the schooling arrangement that would work more effectively is when students are required to learn
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
school
Use synonyms
grounds. I am forming my opinion under the assumption of two presumptions
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
I believe
children
Use synonyms
will benefit from going to
school
Use synonyms
more
due to
Linking Words
the structured schedules and interactive social settings that will allow
children
Use synonyms
to not only learn from textbooks
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
Linking Words
from the real-life cards that they are bestowed upon. First off, with
regards
Fix the agreement mistake
regard
show examples
to schedules.
Children
Use synonyms
are humans at a considerably early stage in the cycle of life. Before
school
Use synonyms
, the only fixed schedule that they had to reckon with was with their sleep, meal, and possibly shower times. Other aspects of their life
such
Linking Words
as
entertainmnent
Correct your spelling
entertainment
, socializing, and other brain-inducing activities are more often than not done
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
random
timings
Replace the word
times
show examples
of the
day
Use synonyms
,
therefore
Linking Words
creating an array of unstructured
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
of going about their
day
Use synonyms
. By going to
school
Use synonyms
where rules and timetables apply,
children
Use synonyms
are expected to follow a set of ground rules that could help introduce the concept of structure to their
day
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
very structure will likely help teach them how to lead their life, in terms of how they go about their
day
Use synonyms
, but other than that it will
also
Linking Words
help them set a foundation of how to function in a society.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
school
Use synonyms
is an
environnment
Correct your spelling
environment
that consists of multiple layers of social settings, which
includes
Correct subject-verb agreement
include
show examples
the teachers, classmates, staff, guards, and a lot of other
people
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
are staffed
round
Correct your spelling
around
show examples
the clock within the perimeters. Encounters with familiar faces
as well as
Linking Words
exposures
Fix the agreement mistake
exposure
show examples
to new
people
Use synonyms
are equally as important for the human mind's growth, especially for
children
Use synonyms
who are going through very fast brain development stages. Interactions with these
people
Use synonyms
of diverse degrees of background variety can help stimulate
children
Use synonyms
's ability to socialize with
people
Use synonyms
, which is the very limitation that
children
Use synonyms
learning from home just aren't privileged enough to gain. In conclusion, I understand that every child is a different person through and through.
However
Linking Words
different that may be, I definitely do still think that
children
Use synonyms
should at least be given the experience of studying from
school
Use synonyms
at least for a semester or two in a real
school
Use synonyms
, before
Linking Words
then
Rephrase
apply
show examples
proceeding to a homeschool setting if they or their parents prefer to. If not to experience the normalcy of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
regular education, it's at the very least useful to introduce them to the concept of
structured
Correct article usage
a structured
show examples
schedule and social interactions that will be plenty beneficial for their growth in the upcoming years.
Submitted by sarahlumbanraja on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is clearly focused on one main idea or argument.
task achievement
Add more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary by using more varied and precise words.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and avoid repetitive language.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: