The diagram shows the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950.

#changes #place #west #park #school #construction

The map

display

Change the verb form

displays

show examples

the difference that

west park secondary

Correct your spelling

West Park Secondary School

show examples

school

have taken lots of changes from 1950 to 2010.

Overall

it is clear that

earlier

school

was not have

Change the verb form

did not have

show examples

place

Add an article

a place

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for sports and no any space for parking . Currently,in 1950 houses,

playground

Fix the agreement mistake

playgrounds

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and farmland

attach

Wrong verb form

were attached

show examples

Change preposition

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the

school

and

main

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the main

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road in front of the

school

Furthermore

,there were changes in

this

place

car park,science block and sports fields were new additions.

According to

the

place

,that

place

had more develop

and

Correct your spelling

show examples

area of car parking was expanded in 2010

whereas

,playing games area had been short and

also

play ground

Correct your spelling

playground

show examples

was

too

Add an article

the too

show examples

small and main road was still there

as well as

Add an article

the

show examples

school

building was as It is.

Submitted by rs55169611 on Mon Nov 06 2023

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words school, place with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

▼

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

115 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagram shows the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

#Essay1 ☘️ Agree/Disagree ✅ Q: Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects.Other people think that,in today’s world subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Some people prefer to communicate through the phone. Others prefer to interact via email. Which mode of communication do you believe is better, and why?

In some countries, men and women are having babies late in life. What are the reasons? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?