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The percentage of overweight children in western countries has increased by 20% in last 20 years. Discuss the causes and effects of disturbing trend.

#percentage #children #countries #years #effects #trend
Unfortunately, in the contemporary era,the amount of children who are overweight has been increasing year by year. In the
last
 decade, the WHO has said, that
this
 problem would be in the first place if people did not take its instructions. In
this
 essay, I will justify the trend with some relevant examples. There is no shadow of a doubt that, more and more youth have recently become couch potatoes. One of the main reasons for
this
,
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 is the
widespreading
Correct your spelling
widespread
wide-spreading
up-to-date
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of up-to-date
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 gadgets
suchas
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such as
 laptops, smartphones, and VR-reality glasses. To date, there is no need to buy
some
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clothes or food in the market, it can be done by pressing some buttons and it will be delivered to your door.
Also
, young people do not need to meet their friends in the street,
due to
 the enormous amount of social media platforms, like Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat etc.
Consequently
, they only chat with friends online without physical activity. Having said that, it has caused many serious problems in real life. For the time being, overweighting is only the tip of the iceberg. It leads to obesity and at
this
 time a vicious circle has begun. It appears that the person who is suffering from obesity
,
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 has an extremely low level of physical activity.
Therefore
, the problem is progressing as well and other systems of the body are being involved. To be more precise, it inevitably brings
such
 diseases as joint problems, cardiovascular diseases and type
two
Correct your spelling
2
 diabetes. In conclusion, attention to
this
 problem has to be
appeared
Verb problem
paid
show examples
due to
 the serious consequences. Because, if people want to avoid a threat in the future, it will be simpler to prevent it.
Submitted by roker123456 on

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task response
Provide more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear introduction and conclusion to bookend your essay.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary to enhance your essay.
grammatical range
Work on sentence structure, punctuation, and grammar to improve clarity and fluency.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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