A successful person is one who has earned a lot of money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#person #money

Title:

Success

Money

this

time, the richest

people

are identified as the most successful

people

in the society. The

money

is used as tool to measure the

success

of the

people

. We cant completely disagree on

this

, beacuse the whole education system revolves around

this

Philosophy. But in my view, i differ from using the

money

as the tool and would like to consider the purpose or the goal of the individual to measure the

success

. The person who dedicated his major life to attain his goal are the successful person and

money

is always the by

product

of attaining the goal successfully.

For example

, the entrepreneurs are focused on attaining their vision to build their successful

product

where the revenue is the by

product

of it. There is always big difference between the

people

who inherited wealth vs the

people

who built everthing from scatch. You can take away everything from the person who built from scratch and in most of the times, he would able to build it back. Conclusion: In conclusion, i strongly believe the most successful

people

are the

people

who attained their goals successfully and

money

is just the by

product

Also

, we should not use

money

as the tool to measure the

success

Submitted by pradeepadi88 on Tue Nov 07 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and follows a logical order of ideas.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples and evidence to support your ideas.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your essay.

grammatical range

Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity and coherence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

211 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
Some people say that every human being can create art. Others think only people with the ability can create art. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
It is often argued that only some of human beings have ability to create art. From my perspective, it seems not entirly convincing, since every human being can create art. Without the exception, every human have their own talents.
<4
band
Some people think the best way to solve trafic congestion in cities is to provide free public transport 24 hour a day, 7 days a week. Is it good or bad, to what extent do you agree or disagree.
I’d like to appreciate your patience on reading the letter. I went back to PRC MOF for new position since I finished my tour of duty in ADB.How to solve the complex problems and challenges faced in operations during the development of MDBs is the question that I have been thinking about. I'm convinced that staff's interest with passion, experience advantages, and scientific foresight are crucial factors, and mobilizing their enthusiasm and initiative is an effective way for us to overcome all challenges.
4.5
band
Some people think that it is more effective for students to study in a group while others believe that it is better for them to study alone. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
People's attitudes towards what condition to work on a project in school varies from one to another. While a particular group of people believe that group work is more effective, others find working on their own a much better way. In this essay will be discussed these two ways, explaining why I think that teamwork can be the most productive method.
4.5
band
Art is considered an important part of a society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important fo o be taught art? r children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects?
Art is considered significant decision of community as well as indication of its culture. This essay will discuss it is important for children to be taught art and kids should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects.
5
band
One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays, thanks to medical research and economic growth, it is very common for people to live more than their ancestors. Generally speaking is a good thing, however it has its downsides as well.

A successful person is one who has earned a lot of money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people say that every human being can create art. Others think only people with the ability can create art. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think the best way to solve trafic congestion in cities is to provide free public transport 24 hour a day, 7 days a week. Is it good or bad, to what extent do you agree or disagree.

Some people think that it is more effective for students to study in a group while others believe that it is better for them to study alone. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Art is considered an important part of a society as well as an expression of its culture. Do you think it is important fo o be taught art? r children to be taught art? Do you think children should be encouraged to focus on art rather than other subjects?

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?