Some people view teenager conflicts with their parents as a necessary part of growing up, whist others see it something negative which should be avoided. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Some people believe that
conflicts
between parents
and children
are essential in child’s
growth development, Correct article usage
a child’s
while
others insist that conflicts
between them are harmful for
their relationship. Change the preposition
to
This
essay strongly agrees with the statement with
the former position and explains why Change preposition
of
conflicts
between them play a crucial role in the
growth.
Correct article usage
apply
Conflicts
between parents
and children
should be avoided because there is a way
to communicate. If parents
understand their childs’
Change noun form
child’s
feeling
and spend enough time to communicate, Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
then
children
will listen to parents
’ words with respect. For instance
, many experts of
education insist that Change preposition
in
conflicts
determinate
the circumstances and can be the one Replace the word
determine
way
to ruin their relationships. Even if I partly acknowledge this
point of view, I still consider struggles with them aren’t
the things that people can avoid.
First of all, I consider conflict Verb problem
as not
situation
can be the one Fix the agreement mistake
situations
way
of self-exposure of children
. To grow in
Change preposition
on
a
right path, Correct article usage
the
children
must expose their thinking and feelings to their parents
. Because children
are the owner
of their Fix the agreement mistake
owners
life
, they must choose their own Fix the agreement mistake
lives
way
. However
, if they listen only their
Change preposition
to their
parents
’ words, they will regret about
it in the future. Change preposition
apply
For example
, when I had a chance to choose my university, I just followed my parents
’ choice because I just don’t
want to have a conflict with them. And now I regret my decision because I know well about Wrong verb form
didn’t
me
than my Correct pronoun usage
myself
parents
. Moreover
, parents
and children
are in different generation
, which means because their environment of growth is not exactly Fix the agreement mistake
generations
same
, their thinking can’t be Correct article usage
the same
same
always.
In conclusion, even if Correct article usage
the same
conflicts
of
Change preposition
between
children
and parents
can break the relationships, it is essential for several reasons. Children
can expose their thinking by conflicts
and they are the only one
who can make the proper choice for them. Correct pronoun usage
ones
Moreover
, they lived in different environment
, Fix the agreement mistake
environments
Correct word choice
and the
the
thinking Change the word
their
of
Change preposition
apply
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
can’t
be Wrong verb form
couldn’t
same
exactly, which follows Correct article usage
the same
conflicts
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coherence cohesion
You need to ensure a clear logical structure in your essay. While your introduction and conclusion are present, the overall logic could benefit from clearer paragraphing and more explicit linking between main ideas.
task achievement
Your essay partially addresses the task, but more balance is needed in discussing both views before giving your own opinion. Ensure you dedicate equal attention to both perspectives and provide a distinct paragraph for your opinion.
task achievement
Support your main points with specific examples. You offered a personal anecdote about choosing a university, which is good, but more varied illustrations of your arguments would enhance the essay's effectiveness.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?