Television serves many useful functions. It helps people to relax. Besides, it can also be seen as a companion for lonely people. To what extent do you agree with this? Explain why with your own experience.

The impact of
television
has sparked major controversy in society.
While
some
people
believe that
television
helps
people
to relax and might bring several advantages, others claim that the opposite holds true.
This
essay will elaborate on both sides of the debate and
thus
lead to a logical conclusion.
First,
there are numerous reasons why
television
helps
people
to relax and might bring several advantages, but the most crucial one stems from the fact that knowledge and information about our surroundings will play a vital role in the
companion
Replace the word
companionship
show examples
of humankind. As a matter of fact, reality and comedy shows will offer tons of benefits to the family and have many reasons for entertainment and humanity.
According to
a recent study conducted by reputable researchers at Sydney University,
programs
available on TV
such
as news
programs
and movie
programs
will greatly contribute to serving many useful functions for lonely
people
.
Nevertheless
, some
people
adopt an opposing view and tend to believe that the opposite holds true. It is largely attributed to the fact that children watching TV enough may have negative impacts on their sleep and health. To be more precise, the disadvantages of interfering with study time and daily life might be
due to
time wastage and heavy TV viewing.
For instance
, the downsides of bad and good
programs
or channels are critical. In conclusion,
while
there are strong arguments on both sides of the debate, I strongly believe that
television
helps
people
to relax and might bring several advantages.
Submitted by Klein_shy on

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task achievement
The essay provides a balanced discussion of both perspectives, but the response could be more focused on addressing the specific prompt. Consider providing clearer examples and elaborating on the personal experience more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure is present, but the essay could benefit from a more explicit introduction and conclusion. Ensure that each paragraph is well-connected, and the flow of ideas is maintained throughout the essay.
lexical resource
The vocabulary used is fairly appropriate, but there is room to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to enhance the overall quality of the essay.
grammatical range
Although the essay demonstrates a good command of grammar, varying sentence structures and the use of more complex grammatical forms would further elevate the quality of the writing.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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