IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

some people prefer to spend thier lives doing the same things and avoiding change others, however,think that changes is always a good thing. discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #thier #lives #change #changes
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Nowadays, Some
individuals
Use synonyms
 prefer to spend their lives doing the same things
also
Linking Words
 without any challenges.
However
Linking Words
, starting
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
 challenge can lead to achieving new experiences in
this
Linking Words
 essay I will argue both views and my own opinion. On the one hand,
fallowing
Correct your spelling
following
show examples
 changes can change
human
Add an article
the human
a human
show examples
 mindset. It means that can help people to stand out on their own feet. And increase levels of satisfaction
for instance
Linking Words
 the number of individual who complete new challenges they achieve
aspect
Change the noun form
aspects
show examples
 of their performance
such
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 as rapport or punctuality.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, challenges can decrease demotivate and aid poor mindsets to improve
level
Add an article
the level
show examples
 of
lives
Fix the agreement mistake
life
show examples
also
Linking Words
 desirable development.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some
individuals
Use synonyms
 prefer to do repetitive tasks.
This
Linking Words
 means that they try to relax and focus on their minds these activities can help to concentrate on their work.
In addition
Linking Words
, engaging in repetitive and routine tasks can make
individuals
Use synonyms
 feel important. they may feel they play a crucial role in their organization or own lives.
For example
Linking Words
, teachers can be great instant. Over
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
doing repetitive tasks can aid people to concentrate on their work. In my opinion,
Linking Words
although
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
doing a new challenge can improve skills
such
Linking Words
 as communication and decrease demotivate.
But
Correct word choice
However
show examples
 I believe that focusing on one task can be better. because it leads to
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 concentration and
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
feel
Correct pronoun usage
me feel
show examples
 important. In conclusion, both views can help
individuals
Use synonyms
 in
a special situations
Correct the article-noun agreement
special situations
a special situation
show examples
 and make
feel
Correct pronoun usage
them feel
show examples
 responsible and important person in their organization.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that ideas are logically connected throughout the essay.
task achievement
Use relevant examples to support your ideas and ensure that they directly address the essay prompt.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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