IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Today in many countries people are living in a ‘throwaway” society where things are used for a short time and then throw away. What do you think is the cause and what problems will it lead to

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In recent times, people have argued that a lifestyle like a throwaway society is modern and ordinary without the awareness that it brings several drawbacks. There are some reasons and consequences of
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 problem, and I will outline them in
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 essay. On the one hand,
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 issue results from the characteristics of humans and the high productivity of industries or companies.
Firstly
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, in the past until now most people have had a habit that when they receive a new thing, they may throw the old one into the rubbish or give it to others.
For example
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, a child when he is given a novel toy by their parents, may forget the other toys, even never using them again.
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, several companies with many products published make users want to buy and experience all of them.
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, the consumers purchase a huge quantity of products with the same function which leads to them utilising it in a short time and
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 changing to another and after a long time it becomes a bad habit.
On the other hand
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,
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 issue causes a decline in the quality of the environment. First of all, when consumers waste too many products resulting in plastic being released into nature, it takes large efforts of scientists and the government to solve
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.
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, when there is a huge consumption, the producers will try to improve productivity, so a great deal of materials may be exploited leading to the safety of many animals. If people do not resolve
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 problem,  plastic may harm several environments
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 as habitats of ocean and forest animals. Specifically, an article shows that a whale died after it ate plastics
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 of food and another report shows that some creatures are at risk of extinction because their habitats are destroyed by humans. In conclusion, a throwaway society results from the instinct of humans and consumers' demands and the productivity of companies, and
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 issue negatively affects the existence of many animals.

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coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be more impactful. Ensure that the introduction sets the context of the essay. Provide a clear and memorable conclusion that summarizes the key points and provides a final thought on the topic.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and gives relevant examples to support the main points. However, the arguments could be further developed, and more concrete examples or evidence could be provided to strengthen the ideas.
coherence cohesion
There is evidence of a logical structure in the essay, but the essay lacks consistency in maintaining the logical flow of ideas. Work on using cohesive devices to connect sentences and paragraphs more effectively.
lexical resource
The essay shows a good range of vocabulary and uses appropriate words and phrases to convey meaning. However, aim to include more variety in vocabulary and explore more complex and sophisticated expressions to enhance lexical resource.
grammatical range
The essay demonstrates a fairly good control of grammar and sentence structures, but there are instances of grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Pay attention to sentence structure, subject-verb agreement, and correct word usage to improve grammatical range.
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