IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some think the current generation should take steps to protect the environment for the next generation.to what extend do you agree or dis agree.

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It is true that the current
generation
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 should take steps to protect the
environment
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 for the next
generation
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.
While
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 some
people
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 tend towards the viewpoint that not to protect the
environment
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 for the next
generation
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.I would like to support the idea that the current
generation
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 should take steps to protect the
environment
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 for the next
generation
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. On the one hand,it is understandable for some
people
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 to believe that not to protect the
environment
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.One of the main reasons can be they think that
this
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 is not their business.
For example
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,some
people
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 do not have children ,they live alone , so they only think about themselves.
Furthermore
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,the
world
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 nowadays is hard to survive,
people
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 cannot take care
themselves
Change preposition
of themselves
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 so they do not think about others.
On the other hand
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, it is more convincing for me to protect the
environment
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 just for the next
generation
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.
Firstly
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, I believe that the
last
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generation
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also
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 thinking about
this
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 question,
that is
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 why I am here today because the
last
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generation
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 tried to protect the
environment
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,but I think that they did not do well.
This
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 is because nowadays air pollution is getting worse and worse,
it
Correct word choice
and it
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 already affecting me,
although
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 I only live a few years I will try to make the
world
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 better because I would like to share the beautiful
world
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 just like the
last
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generation
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try
Wrong verb form
tried
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 to share with us.
Secondly
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,
people
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 only live once,we should not be selfish,we should try our best to protect the
environment
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 just because we are sharing the
environment
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 with plants and animals,
this
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 is not just
human
Correct article usage
the human
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world
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. In conclusion,
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 think that protecting the
environment
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 is all
generation
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's responsibility.

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Task Response
The essay shows a partial understanding of the task requirements. It outlines both viewpoints but fails to take a clear position or provide a strong argument for the chosen viewpoint.
Coherence and Cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is weak, with unclear organization of ideas. The introduction and conclusion are present, but the essay lacks coherence in connecting supporting points.
Lexical Resource
The essay demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary and repetitive use of language, leading to a lack of variety and precision in expression.
Grammatical Range
There is a mixture of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in sentence construction and word usage. Greater control over grammar is needed for clarity and accuracy.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental conservation
  • sustainable practices
  • carbon footprint
  • renewable energy
  • deforestation
  • pollution
  • climate change
  • ecosystem
  • biodiversity
  • waste management
  • conservation
  • global warming
  • greenhouse gases
  • natural resources
  • renewable resources
  • fossil fuels
  • reducing emissions
  • eco-friendly
  • recycling
  • alternative energy
What to do next:
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