Some people think that wild animals should not be kept in zoos. Athers believes that there are good reasons for having zoos. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
One
of the most controversial issues today relates to people
thinking that wild animals
should not be kept in zoos
,While
some people
tend towards the viewpoint that should keep the wild animals
in zoos
,others support the idea should not be kept in zoos
.In this
essay, I am going examine both points of view and produce my own opinion.
On one
side of the argument, there are people
who argue that the
wild Correct article usage
apply
animals
in
Add a missing verb
are in
zoos
.The main reason for believing this
is that wild animals
do not have the survival ability nowadays.To be more specific,people
stole natural places from animals
,cut off the forest and made a lot of trash,wild animals
are easy to be attacked by cars or people
.For example
,people
find lots of plastic bags in the animal's bodies, which causes the animal's deaths.It is also
possible to say that some people
think that when animals
are valuable,they will catch the wild animals
just to sell a good price.One
good illustration of this
is many elephants have been killed just because of their tooth,so keeping wild animals
in zoos
is the way to protect them.
On the other hand
,the opposite argument is that people
should not keep wild animals
in zoos
.For one
thing,people
think that wild animals
should be free not for being a product.To illustrate,people
train dolphins to make people
fun and earn money,but dolphins should live in the sea with freedom.For another,the fact that to protect wild animals
is all people
's responsibility,not just to keep them in zoos
.In other words
,we should make this
become common sense,
when all Remove the comma
apply
people
are educated to protect wild animals
,people
can live with animals
together.
In conclusion,although
zoos
are good, nowadays zoos
are not innocent anymore,and zoos
should not use animals
to earn money.I personally prefer wild animals
should not be kept in zoos
.Submitted by ggrunrunderr on
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task response
Task Achievement: The response covers both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion. However, the examples could be more specific and detailed to enhance the argument.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure is mostly clear, and there is a presence of introduction and conclusion. However, the linking of ideas and examples could be improved for better coherence.
lexical resource
Lexical Resource: The use of vocabulary is fairly good, but there is room for improvement in using more varied and nuanced vocabulary to express ideas more precisely.
grammatical range
Grammatical Range: The essay demonstrates reasonably accurate use of grammar structures. However, there are some errors in sentence structure and tense usage that need improvement.
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