More students travel abroad for further education. Do you believe the advantages of this experience are greater than the drawbacks associated with it?
Nowadays,
education
has become an integral of everyone
Change noun form
everyone's
life
with it people cannot achieve goals. Therefore
, for getting
Change preposition
to get
best
study students are migrating Correct article usage
the best
in
big Change preposition
to
cites
. I Correct your spelling
cities
am totally disagree
with Change the verb form
totally disagree
this
statement due to
some reasons. Change preposition
for
This
essay will explain all points in forthcoming paragraphs with relevant facts.
There are plenty of reason
which will help to explain how Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
this
movement will bring
Verb problem
have
negative
impact on our society and country. Correct article usage
a negative
To begin
with, no doubt countries like Canada, America, United Kingdom and other rich lands are offering good quality of education
to learns. But, if new
generation Add an article
the new
will move
there Wrong verb form
moves
for acquiring
study Change preposition
to acquire
then
who will take care of their own nation because some decide to continue further
Correct pronoun usage
their further
life
.
Change the punctuation
?
Moreover
, making decision
to get admission in another state may fall Add an article
the decision
a decision
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
in
Change preposition
into
health related
issues. Add a hyphen
health-related
For example
, anxiety, depression, mental illness and other physical problems. Furthermore
, these days drug addiction is becoming big
issue in Add an article
a big
new
generation. In the absence of parents, their children can choose Add an article
the new
a new
wrong
path Change the article
the wrong
instead
of going college
or Change preposition
to college
universities
. Fix the agreement mistake
university
As a result
, this
will finish the life
of pears as well Fix the agreement mistake
lives
their
parentsCorrect word choice
as their
too
.
Moving towards others bad impacts of relocating the Rephrase
apply
birth place
, Correct your spelling
birthplace
this
decision may cause os burden because they have to balance their study with work as well. For
Change preposition
To
the
Correct article usage
apply
survival
in other Replace the word
survive
cities
they have to pay Add a comma
cities,
schools
charges, grocery bills and home Change the noun form
school
rents
Fix the agreement mistake
rent
own
. Their parents cannot support them because all nations have different Verb problem
apply
level
of economy. To manage, all Fix the agreement mistake
levels
such
things they to
do work for Add a missing verb
have to
long
time Change the article
a long
while
studying. However
, this
management can teach them how to live life
in difficult situations without guardians. One advantage of this
decision make their own country more rich
. After completing degrees in science, doctor, Replace the words
richer
teacher line
, engineering, and politics, they can give new Replace the word
teaching
path
by doing new inventions or by opening Fix the agreement mistake
paths
same
Correct article usage
the same
education
places.
In conclusion, this
statements
brings Fix the agreement mistake
statement
with
more drawbacks Change preposition
apply
then
Replace the word
than
positive
. I assume that students should continue Fix the agreement mistake
positives
higher
level of Add an article
a higher
education
in their own place instead
of leaving loved ones.Submitted by harmandeep51075 on
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task response
Improve your task response by carefully addressing each aspect of the prompt. Ensure that your essay clearly presents a well-structured argument that addresses both the advantages and drawbacks of students traveling abroad for further education.
coherence and cohesion
Work on improving the coherence and cohesion of your essay by organizing your ideas more effectively. Use clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensure that your ideas flow logically from one to the next. Additionally, provide a clear introduction and conclusion that summarize your main points.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary and use a wider range of lexical resources to add depth and clarity to your essay. Avoid repetition and strive for varied and precise language that enhances the overall quality of your writing.
grammatical range
Focus on improving the grammatical range of your writing by using a wider range of grammatical structures. This can help you express yourself more precisely and demonstrate a higher level of control over the English language.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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