IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

Number of tourists visiting a Caribbean island(2010-2017)

#tourists #caribbean #island
The graph compares the
quantity
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of visitors who came to a Caribbean
island
 over the period of seven years( 2010-2017).
Overall
, what stands out from the graph is that the total number of tourists, visiting Caribbean
island
Fix the agreement mistake
islands
show examples
 always increased during the given period.
Additionally
, the figure for visitors staying on cruise ships was lower than that
,
Change preposition
of, who
show examples
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
 decided to choose
staying
Change the verb form
to stay
show examples
 on
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
. Looking at the highest rate, the
tolal
Correct your spelling
total
 number of
new comers
Correct your spelling
newcomers
show examples
showed
Verb problem
was
show examples
 exactly 1 million in 2010, before increasing slightly to
2.5millions
Correct your spelling
2.5 million
Change preposition
in
show examples
till
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2014 and
this
 figure remained stable at around
Correct your spelling
2.7 million
2.7millions
Correct your spelling
2.7 million
 in the following year, before reaching a
Correct your spelling
peak
show examples
pick
Correct your spelling
peak
show examples
 at
Correct your spelling
3.5 million
3.5millions
Correct your spelling
3.5 million
 in 2017. Turning to the lower rates, people who chose cruise ships mostly experienced a level off in 2010, 2011 and from 2013 to 2015 (
1.5millions
Correct your spelling
1.5 million
) and witnessed a small drop in 2016, but increased to
1.5millions
Correct your spelling
1.5 million
 in the following year.
While
 the number of travellers staying on
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 lower than
1million
Correct your spelling
1 million
 till 2014,
however
,
this
 rate showed a slight increase till the end of the given period.
Submitted by sevara19alimova on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Provide a clear overview of the main trends in the graph.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion are well-structured and effective.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and ensure accuracy in word choice.
grammatical range
Use a variety of sentence structures and ensure accuracy in grammar usage.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuation
  • peak
  • trough
  • upward trend
  • downward trend
  • steady increase
  • sharp decline
  • seasonal variation
  • cruise ship visitors
  • island stay visitors
  • economic impact
  • environmental impact
  • tourism industry
  • sustainable tourism
What to do next:
Look at other essays: