IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

When talking about success, we often think of people who are rich or famous. In your opinion, what are the qualities that characterise a successful person? Why do you think these should be the criteria? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It is very common for people to confuse success with popularity or wealth. In my opinion,
hard-working
Correct article usage
a hard-working
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 populace who
also
Linking Words
 display
the
Correct article usage
an
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 unyielding attitude towards their ultimate aim,
are
Change the verb form
is
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 most likely to be unfazed in challenging times and pursue with
same
Add an article
the same
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 enthusiasm for their
goals
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. The most high achievers demonstrate traits
such
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 as
hardwork
Correct your spelling
hard work
 and persistence.
Although
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 it is true that success may come easy to a few luckier ones, the majority of successful people expend a lot of
Use synonyms
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
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 and time to accomplish their
goals
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.
For example
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, in
order
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 to rise to the rank of a celebrated chef, Gordon
ramsay
Change the capitalization
Ramsay
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 has confessed to
work
Change the verb form
working
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 100 hours a week in the fledgling days of his career.
Moreover
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, people often quit on their dreams
due to
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 a lack of willpower to survive in adverse situations;
therefore
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,
this
Linking Words
 mandates a person to demonstrate relentlessness in
order
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 to prevail in his
endeavors
Change the spelling
endeavours
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. The devotion to one's targets and tenacious
efforts
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 are the most important factors to succeed in
this
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 world. Working tirelessly ensures enough practice and the experience which is necessitated in
order
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 to gain any expertise.
For example
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, a typical graduate needs many years of
a
Correct article usage
apply
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stellar performance and work experience in
order
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 to become the CEO of a company. These higher positions are highly competitive and impart a sense of accomplishment among those who exhibit the mettle to thrive in their
endeavors
Change the spelling
endeavours
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.
Furthermore
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,
such
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 individuals do not succumb to pressure
,
Remove the comma
apply
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and display an unwavering focus and continue their relentless
efforts
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 to accomplish their
goals
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.
This
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 greatly
increase
Change the verb form
increases
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 their odds of attaining success. In conclusion,
surving
Correct your spelling
surviving
 and thriving in one's pursuit are the most important attributes of successful
personalities
Fix the agreement mistake
personality
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; which necessitates not only enormous
efforts
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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but
also
Linking Words
a
Remove the article
apply
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persistence in
order
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 to chase down
their
Change the word
the
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goals
Use synonyms
 that, are set by an individual.

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grammatical range accuracy
Expand the range of grammatical structures and pay attention to punctuation to enhance grammatical range and accuracy.
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