The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian coountries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

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The provided line graph compares the proportion of urban inhabitants of four distinct countries in Asia, namely

Philippines

Correct article usage

the Philippines

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Malaysia

Use synonyms

, Thailand and

Indonesia

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, throughout a 50-year period, accompanying expectations for 2030 and 2040.

Overall

Linking Words

it is clear that

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

the population in all four countries are expecting upward trends over the period in question,

this

Linking Words

increase is projected to be sharper in

Malaysia

Use synonyms

and

Indonesia

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. In terms of the population congestion in

Malaysia

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, in 1970, just und a third ( 30% ) of the Malaysian individuals were living in cities. Interestingly, a fairly equal percentage of

Phlippineans

Correct your spelling

Philippines

were urban inhabitants

initially

Linking Words

Moreover

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

the figure for

Malaysia

Use synonyms

is projected to witness a significant increase

onwards

Rephrase

apply

show examples

to reach 85% in 2040,

this

Linking Words

increment was more negligible for

Philippines

Correct article usage

the Philippines

show examples

, reaching a peak of half by 2040. Regarding the urban population of Thailand and

Indonesia

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, the proportion of city residents stood at approximately 19% and 14%, respectively.

Additionally

Linking Words

Whereas

Linking Words

the figures for these two countries shared an equal percentage at merely 28% in 2000,

Indonesia

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overtook Thailand in terms of the percentage of city residents over

this

Linking Words

half-century period and is expected to hit a high of 60% in 2040.

Submitted by parvizrashidi on Sat Nov 11 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words malaysia, indonesia with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

196 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

urbanization
population
percentage
trend
growth
stagnation
prediction
projection
rapid
gradual
significant
factors

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The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian coountries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Some feel that it is impossible for a country to be economically progressive and environmentally friendly at the same time. Others disagree with this view. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

in some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. what are reasons for this? how can people research this?

Many goverments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is the schools' responsibility to teach students good behaviour in addition to providing formal education. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience

The world is experiencing a dramatic increase in population. This is causing problems not only for poor, undeveloped countries, but also for industrialized and developing nations. Describe some of the problems that overpopulation causes, and suggestion least one possible solution.