The line graph shows the average number of weekly patients visiting four clinics of a hospital from 2010 to 2016

#line #patients #four #clinics

The line graph displays the mean figure of

patients

that

stop

Wrong verb form

stopped

show examples

by, Four different clinics of a hospital, weekly, between 2010 and 2016.

Overall

, it is readily apparent that individuals visiting the Diabetic and Eye departments showed a steady but significant increase over the period of time.

Patients

going to see the dental clinic rose only slightly,

However

, The proportion of

patients

visiting the birth control

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

fluctuated throughout the years and never increased. In 2010, Civilians coming to the Eye and diabetic clinics were nearly 130 and 70 respectively. The number of

patients

going to the Diabetic departments started rising from 2010 to 2012 and remained steady till 2014 (around 99),

Then

suddenly shot up to 180 clients in 2016. In comparison,

patients

visiting the Eyesight section in 2010 increased slightly in 2012 to 150 but

then

surged dramatically to 350

patients

weekly, in 2016.

On the other hand

, The Dental department only had 100

patients

weekly in 2010 but halved by 2012 (50),

Although

it increased to 130 visitors in 2014, it remained steady till 2016.

On the contrary

, the total amount of visitors at the birth control centre was the highest amongst the 4 in 2010 (around 250) and

then

increased to 250 in 2012 but

then

declined in 2014 nearly to 180 individuals and

Correct your spelling

raised

rose

rise

rised

Correct your spelling

rose

show examples

again in 2016 to 250 again

Submitted by amnahazfar03 on Sun Nov 12 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words patients with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 5 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

225 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The line graph shows the average number of weekly patients visiting four clinics of a hospital from 2010 to 2016

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific world, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Employers should give their staff at least a 4-week holiday a year to help employees perform better in their jobs. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that the government should spend more money in putting in more works of art like painting and statutes in cities to make them better places to live in. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

task 2: Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks and motorcycles are banned from the city center. People are encouraged to use public transportation such as buses, taxis and metro on vehicle-free days. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?