Many people are worried about cyber crime and identity theft. What kinds of problems is it causing? What can be done to solve this problem?

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In recent years, loss
identity
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of identity
show examples
in bank
account
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accounts
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, social media
account
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accounts
show examples
, and much more are quite popular, which
known
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is known
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lately as a cyber-crime.
This
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essay will examine the main causes of cyber-crime and provide possible
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
show examples
to the problem. In former
time
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times
show examples
,
people
Use synonyms
have
Verb problem
were
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less savvy about
scam
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scams
show examples
on the internet. They are not realized
while
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fill
Wrong verb form
filling out
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the form or
click
Wrong verb form
clicking
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on the link that has no clear resources, it has
a
Correct article usage
the
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potential to lead to identity steal.
For instance
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,
people
Use synonyms
are filled
Wrong verb form
fill out
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the online form
due to
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terms and conditions for able to get
some
Correct determiner usage
a
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shopping voucher without knowing that action will bring
to
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apply
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privacy loss.
However
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, there is another thing where
people
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trust easily
to
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apply
show examples
unknown callers who persuade
about
Correct pronoun usage
them about
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something which
require
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requires
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some data.
For example
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, to
have
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apply
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redeem the prize someone needs to give some information to the speaker,
include
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including
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the address,
phone
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and phone
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number,
until
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and
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the bank account without realizing it comes to financial loss and fraud. Some possible solutions to
this
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problem are more
educating
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educate
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people
Use synonyms
about crime on the internet
make
Correct word choice
and make
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them aware
with
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of
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that, because if someone is mindful, they will prevent
to
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apply
show examples
some suspicious things from unknown.
In addition
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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governments and tech companies should
have
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apply
show examples
collaboration
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collaborate
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to tackle all the issues and
increased
Wrong verb form
increase
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cybersecurity. In conclusion, many
people
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who
worried
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are worried
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about cybercrime will lose
the
Change the word
their
show examples
trust in online
transaction
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transactions
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.
However
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, it can
solve
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be solved
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with
Change preposition
by
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upgrading the regulations through collaboration between the government and tech companies,
while
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people
Use synonyms
in
Correct article usage
the educating
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educating
Replace the word
education
show examples
process about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cybercrime.
Submitted by fatimanastitiniskala on

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Structure
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they need further development to fully address the essay question and provide a clear roadmap for the reader.
Coherence and Cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is somewhat coherent, but there are areas where the flow of ideas could be improved for better clarity and cohesion.
Vocabulary
There is a fair range of vocabulary used, but be cautious with word choice and ensure that the terminology used is accurate and appropriate for the context.
Grammar
The essay demonstrates a fair command of grammatical structures, but there are errors present that affect the overall coherence and accuracy of the essay. Focus on sentence structure and tense consistency.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cyber crime
  • identity theft
  • hackers
  • data breach
  • phishing
  • online scams
  • vulnerable
  • sensitive information
  • financial transactions
  • online privacy
  • digital footprint
  • cybersecurity
  • online security
  • awareness campaigns
  • legislation
  • enforcement
  • collaboration
What to do next:
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