Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. What do you think is the reason for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

#forms #leisure #activity #countries #adults #reason #development

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In many states, young adults spend their time to purchase goods as the most popular entertainment

activity

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This

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essay believes that

this

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lifestyle is influenced by social

media

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content

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which eases marketing and buying

activity

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and

also

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leads to negative effects in overspending. Nowadays, purchasing goods is the most common leisure

activity

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for young adults caused by social

media

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influence. The majority of

people

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have social

media

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and consume visual

content

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every day, which is super addicting and fun to do. They spend their time lying down, watching

content

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incorporated by marketing strategies made by some influencers. Some platforms

also

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provide one-click away to buy the goods.

This

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practical and convenient way leads them to purchase

while

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enjoying free time.

For instance

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while

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scrolling through Instagram, there is

content

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made by famous

people

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, displaying cute outfits and tagging the shops. Shopping as a leisure

activity

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has a negative impact. Young

people

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tend to follow the trend and they fear missing out,

consequently

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, they may buy impulsively unimportant or overpriced things. Some

content

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creators make exaggerated reviews about the products, and

people

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tend to believe and want to experience them themselves.

This

Linking Words

activity

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leads to being consumptive.

For instance

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, in seasonal brand fashion trends, younger

people

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purchase specific super small bags because everyone wears them, not because they serve the purpose. In conclusion, shopping has become the most common entertainment

activity

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because of the massive amount of social

media

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exposure, its marketing

content

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and its convenience for home delivery.

This

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essay views that

this

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brings a negative impact

such

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as increasing consumerism.

Submitted by intanannisa.ia on Sun Nov 12 2023

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task response

You have provided a relevant response to the task question, but ensure your points are well-developed and fully addressed.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has clear introduction and conclusion. However, work on developing your ideas with more detailed support and examples within each paragraph.

lexical resource

Your use of vocabulary is effective and relevant to the topic. Try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary and use more academic and formal language where appropriate.

grammatical range

You have demonstrated a good control of grammar and punctuation. However, aim for more complex sentence structures and appropriate use of conjunctions to enhance your writing.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. What do you think is the reason for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Your opinion

The most importan aim of science is to should be to improve people's life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this estatement

Many people in cities today live in high-rise apartment blocks. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this type of living.

Students are becoming more and more reliant on the internet. While the internet is convenient, it has many negative effects and its use for educational purposes should be restricted. How far do you agree with this statement?

Some people argue that the government should give every unemployed person a mobile phone and should make sure they have access to the Internet. They believe this is the best way of using public money to reduce the problem of unemployment. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people put their personal information online for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is positive or negative development?