Shopping is now one of the most popular forms of leisure activity in many countries for young adults. What do you think is the reason for this? Is this a positive or negative development?
In many states, young adults spend their time to purchase goods as the most popular entertainment
activity
. This
essay believes that this
lifestyle is influenced by social media
content
which eases marketing and buying activity
and also
leads to negative effects in overspending.
Nowadays, purchasing goods is the most common leisure activity
for young adults caused by social media
influence. The majority of people
have social media
and consume visual content
every day, which is super addicting and fun to do. They spend their time lying down, watching content
incorporated by marketing strategies made by some influencers. Some platforms also
provide one-click away to buy the goods. This
practical and convenient way leads them to purchase while
enjoying free time. For instance
, while
scrolling through Instagram, there is content
made by famous people
, displaying cute outfits and tagging the shops.
Shopping as a leisure activity
has a negative impact. Young people
tend to follow the trend and they fear missing out, consequently
, they may buy impulsively unimportant or overpriced things. Some content
creators make exaggerated reviews about the products, and people
tend to believe and want to experience them themselves. This
activity
leads to being consumptive. For instance
, in seasonal brand fashion trends, younger people
purchase specific super small bags because everyone wears them, not because they serve the purpose.
In conclusion, shopping has become the most common entertainment activity
because of the massive amount of social media
exposure, its marketing content
and its convenience for home delivery. This
essay views that this
brings a negative impact such
as increasing consumerism.Submitted by intanannisa.ia on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
You have provided a relevant response to the task question, but ensure your points are well-developed and fully addressed.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has clear introduction and conclusion. However, work on developing your ideas with more detailed support and examples within each paragraph.
lexical resource
Your use of vocabulary is effective and relevant to the topic. Try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary and use more academic and formal language where appropriate.
grammatical range
You have demonstrated a good control of grammar and punctuation. However, aim for more complex sentence structures and appropriate use of conjunctions to enhance your writing.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!