Some individuals say that mobile is unnecessary for a young group over other things that it's useful for young ones discuss both views and give your opinion

It is hard to imagine in the modern era a young person without a modern gadget in their hands.

Although

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such

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devices as mobile phones or

tabs

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tablets

show examples

might give many

usefull

Correct your spelling

useful

tools for an educational process as it may seem,

but

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apply

show examples

there are some hidden

harmfull

Correct your spelling

harmful

effects which can be given

also

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, as I am going to explain

further

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. First and foremost, state-of-the-art smartphones may have unlimited possibilities for studying at schools. It would seem that

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apply

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more and more applications for education have been appearing day by day. To exemplify, in today's world contemporary applications like Zoom or Skype have implemented tutors from all over the globe, especially if pupil's parents want their child to

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

learnt

Correct your spelling

learn

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a unique musical instrument like

harp

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the harp

show examples

Moreover

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, it can be

extremelly

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extremely

necessary in case of an emergency

due to

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GPS technology.

On the other hand

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, there is always two sides of a coin. Uncontrolled using can

also

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do too much harm not only for mental children's health

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apply

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but

also

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may lead to some serious crimes. To be more precise, mobile

phone

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phones

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sometimes can transform a normal average child into

Correct article usage

a coach

show examples

coach

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couch

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potatoe

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potatoes

potato

because of an enormous amount of useless or even harmful content.

For instance

Linking Words

, phishing sites or really dangerous criminals sometimes provide information about earning easy money and ,

unfortunatelly

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unfortunately

, it often finishes dramatically. Children may be kidnapped or even raped. In conclusion, in my view, there is no opportunity for mobile phones to be banned in the contemporary era

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apply

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because they are simply ubiquitous.

However

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, it must be controlled strictly by

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the teacher

a teacher

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teacher

Fix the agreement mistake

teachers

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in schools and parents at home and if it

would be

Wrong verb form

show examples

so, it ought to have brought only positive effects.

roker123456

Nov 12, 2023

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Task Achievement

Address the task as per the prompt. Ensure that both views are discussed and provide a clear opinion based on the given topic.

Coherence & Cohesion

Use a more coherent structure to present ideas and arguments. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph is linked logically to the next.

Lexical Resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to express ideas with more precision and variety. Also, pay attention to word choices and use appropriate transitions to improve coherence.

Grammatical Range

Pay attention to sentence structure, verb tenses, punctuation, and subject-verb agreement to enhance clarity and coherence in the essay.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

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Some individuals say that mobile is unnecessary for a young group over other things that it's useful for young ones discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think that killing animals for food is cruel, but others claim that animals are a necessary part of diet. What is your opinion?

People buy a product if it fulfills their needs, there is no need for advertisement. To what extent do you agree or disagree with it?

Advertising is becoming more and more common in everyday life. Is it a positive or negative development?

Your landlord is asking to increase the rent. Write a letter to him. In your letter, you should tell: why you think the rent shouldn’t be increased what you will do if it is increased.