Some individuals say that mobile is unnecessary for a young group over other things that it's useful for young ones discuss both views and give your opinion

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It is hard to imagine in the modern era a young person without a modern gadget in their hands.
Although
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,
such
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devices as mobile phones or
tabs
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tablets
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might give many
usefull
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useful
tools for an educational process as it may seem,
but
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apply
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there are some hidden
harmfull
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harmful
effects which can be given
also
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, as I am going to explain
further
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. First and foremost, state-of-the-art smartphones may have unlimited possibilities for studying at schools. It would seem that
,
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apply
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more and more applications for education have been appearing day by day. To exemplify, in today's world contemporary applications like Zoom or Skype have implemented tutors from all over the globe, especially if pupil's parents want their child to
be
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apply
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learnt
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learn
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a unique musical instrument like
harp
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the harp
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.
Moreover
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, it can be
extremelly
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extremely
necessary in case of an emergency
due to
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GPS technology.
On the other hand
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, there is always two sides of a coin. Uncontrolled using can
also
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do too much harm not only for mental children's health
,
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but
also
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may lead to some serious crimes. To be more precise, mobile
phone
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phones
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sometimes can transform a normal average child into
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a coach
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coach
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couch
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potatoe
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potatoes
potato
because of an enormous amount of useless or even harmful content.
For instance
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, phishing sites or really dangerous criminals sometimes provide information about earning easy money and ,
unfortunatelly
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unfortunately
, it often finishes dramatically. Children may be kidnapped or even raped. In conclusion, in my view, there is no opportunity for mobile phones to be banned in the contemporary era
,
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apply
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because they are simply ubiquitous.
However
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, it must be controlled strictly by
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the teacher
a teacher
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teacher
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teachers
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in schools and parents at home and if it
would be
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is
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so, it ought to have brought only positive effects.
Submitted by roker123456 on

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Task Achievement
Address the task as per the prompt. Ensure that both views are discussed and provide a clear opinion based on the given topic.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a more coherent structure to present ideas and arguments. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph is linked logically to the next.
Lexical Resource
Expand your range of vocabulary to express ideas with more precision and variety. Also, pay attention to word choices and use appropriate transitions to improve coherence.
Grammatical Range
Pay attention to sentence structure, verb tenses, punctuation, and subject-verb agreement to enhance clarity and coherence in the essay.
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