Film stars and celebrities often share their views on public matters that have little to do with their profession. Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, movie stars and celebrities frequently give their thoughts openly to the public, even though some of them are not related to their jobs. Some consider that
this
situation can alter people's lives in a bad way.
Nonetheless
, I contend that public figures still can have positive influences outside their respective fields. There are some actions that they can do to give positive influences.
To begin
with, superstars can use their popularity as a platform to spread good messages. As they are known everywhere, their campaigns reach many people all over the
world
. The existence of their fans can accelerate the thoughts as well because they are loyal to their idol and follow anything they do.
For instance
, Selena Gomez posted about charity on her
instagram
Change the capitalization
Instagram
show examples
,
then
she collected
million
Fix the agreement mistake
millions
show examples
dollars
Change preposition
of dollars
show examples
in only one week. I believe
this
world
could be a better place if all celebs did that.
Furthermore
, they can
also
spread motivational values. Their struggles to achieve their dream
inspires
Correct subject-verb agreement
inspire
show examples
a lot of kids around the
world
. Ronaldo’s story is a prime example, his efforts when he was young do not relate to the soccer theme, but his spirit is contagious to children. We can learn from that story that if we keep dreaming and doing our parts, success will come eventually.
However
, some of them, indeed, share their bad lifestyles on social media platforms. These sorts of things affect teenagers
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
are not capable enough to decide what is good or bad, yet.
Hence
, adult supervision is needed in
this
case. Parents can do it by regularly communicating what is currently happening in the celebrity
world
and
give
Wrong verb form
giving
show examples
some light lectures about that. In conclusion, popular people can act as influencers to disseminate inspirational
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
such
as charity or spirits to become successful. And for young audiences, parents should guide their children
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
explicit content.
Submitted by erniwbs on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that all ideas are directly relevant to the task question. There should be a clear focus on whether the influence of celebrities on public matters is positive or negative, and this should be sustained throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Work on maintaining a logical and coherent structure throughout the essay. Ensure that ideas and examples are connected in a clear and organized manner, and that the overall progression of ideas is easy to follow.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely and effectively. Use a combination of simple and complex vocabulary to convey meaning and avoid repetition of the same words or phrases.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and ensure a varied and accurate use of grammar. Work on using complex sentences, avoiding errors in subject-verb agreement, and using appropriate verb tenses.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: