Writing task 2: More people than ever travel other countries? Why is this the case? Is this a positive or negative development?
These days, many
people
have decided to travel
abroad than domestic tourism. From my point of view, there are many reasons behind this
, and I this
trend to have more benefits development
. I will shed light on the issues in the following essay.
To begin
with, people
opt to travel
abroad rather than within their own countries for three main reasons. First of all, many people
are to study different things surrounding the country
they visit. For example
, most parents and their children often visit historical sites such
as temples, museums, and pagodas. Consequently
, encouraging young children's development
and curiosity. Additionally
, people
can explore when they visit different nations, which enriches their knowledge. Secondly
, some individuals go overseas to breathtaking locations, like islands and resorts in the mountains, which are unlike anything they would find at home, to relax. Finally
, visitors can learn more about history, culture, and cuisine by traveling
outside the Change the spelling
travelling
country
.
In my view, the tendency to travel
overseas is increasing this
phenomenon would be a positive development
in various facets. Firstly
, international traveling
brings numerous economic benefits to host countries. Because selling their traditional foods and renting out houses to visitors brings in more money for the Change the spelling
travelling
country
's residents. Furthermore
, the tourism industry develops, leading to created jobs and economic growth in their country
. Secondly
, traveling
overseas help Change the spelling
travelling
people
improve their language skill and life experiences. For instance
, travelers
need to learn a few local languages when visiting other nations, as most Change the spelling
travellers
people
there speak their tongue.
In conclusion, people
travel
to other countries to acquire new knowledge and relax. In my opinion, this
development
is positive because it helps people
's personal development
and economic growth.Submitted by quynhtranhbh on
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coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay needs improvement to enhance coherence and cohesion. Ensure that paragraphs are well-sequenced and that there is a clear progression of ideas.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present but need to be more developed. Ensure that the introduction introduces the main ideas and the conclusion summarizes the key points and provides a final thought or recommendation.
coherence cohesion
The main points are generally supported with relevant examples, but more specific details can be provided to further reinforce the ideas.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the task with a clear presentation of ideas, but it could benefit from a more comprehensive exploration of the topic.
task achievement
The ideas presented are generally clear and relevant to the topic, but they would benefit from further expansion and development to provide a more comprehensive exploration of the issues.
task achievement
The essay includes relevant specific examples to support the main points and demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.