Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory, job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #situations

In the contemporary landscape, individuals grapple with the dilemma of whether to acquiesce to unfavorable circumstances,

such

as an unsatisfactory job or financial constraints, or to proactively strive for improvement.

This

essay delves into the contrasting perspectives, one advocating for acceptance rooted in historical practices, and the other championing

proactive

efforts for personal and societal progress. Body Paragraph 1: (Band 7) Historically, the prevailing notion of embracing one's destiny finds its roots in the experiences of our ancestors. In eras characterized by rigid societal structures and limited individual mobility, people were compelled to reconcile with their circumstances, showcasing resilience in the face of adversity.

However

, critics argue that

this

perspective perpetuates complacency and serves the interests of those in power, stifling individual agency. Body Paragraph 2: (Band 7)

Conversely

, a burgeoning cohort champions the active pursuit of change and improvement. They posit that a mindset centered on progress is the linchpin for overcoming challenges and achieving success.

This

proactive

ethos, though demanding, is exemplified by individuals who have transcended humble beginnings to accomplish remarkable feats.

For instance

, the narrative of [provide a relevant historical or contemporary example] serves as a testament to the transformative power of a

proactive

approach. Conclusion: (Band 7) In summation, the discourse on accepting undesirable circumstances versus actively striving for improvement is nuanced.

While

historical contexts may have shaped the inclination to embrace fate, the modern era fosters a more

proactive

mindset. Personally, I align with the belief that conscious efforts to enhance one's situation not only lead to personal fulfillment but

also

contribute substantively to societal progress. The interplay between acceptance and endeavor is dynamic, offering individuals the agency to shape their destinies in an ever-evolving world.

Submitted by anayasinwriting on Mon Nov 13 2023

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Task Response

To achieve a higher score in Task Response, make sure to fully answer the question prompt, providing a clear opinion and discussing both views comprehensively. Include more specific examples and a more detailed analysis to substantiate your points.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay should exhibit a sophisticated range of cohesive devices and paragraphing. Aim for seamless transitions between ideas to enhance the overall clarity and flow of your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

282 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

adversity
resilience
stoicism
contentment
cope
adapt
endure
persevere
settle
ambition
tenacious
determined
resourceful
optimistic
self-improvement
proactive
initiative
transform
overcome
confront

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