Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later. Some people think that they are the best people to talk to school students about the danger of crime committing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people believe that several convicts who have been in prison for a

while

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are good citizens now and, they are a good choice to talk to pupils about

offenses

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offences

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. I personally partially agree with

this

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statement and I guess

this

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activity might be beneficial or dangerous. In

this

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essay, I will argue my opinion. In my point of view, it is a good idea that

children

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are informed about crimes and their consequences on their lives and communication, and who is better than a person who has committed infringements before and now has a reliable character to advise and admit his regret? Their stories can have a stronger impact on youngsters than theoretical lessons. Students can be aware that if they step into these dangerous groups, they will lose numerous precious individuals in their lives.

For example

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, they aren'

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endorsed on their family and friend's behalf emotionally and monetary.

In addition

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, they constantly encounter dangerous issues and threats, so that, they can'

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sleep in peace of mind.

Finally

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, they can explain how

offenses

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stray

children

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from their aims and if they immerse themselves in crimes, they won'

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be able to find a way to rescue themselves and their whole lives will be ruined.

On the other hand

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, I believe that we should consider the potential effects and subsequent of these methods,

however

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, schools should be cautious about someone that they want to invite to talk. Because some of the former prisoners are still a band and it is their trick to go to schools and seduce

children

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For instance

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, they can give a number of information about the student's address and parents and burglar their possessions.

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, it is difficult to find an accurate person. In conclusion, undoubtedly, debate about criminals at schools is beneficial but teachers need to ensure that who they intend to invite and give a speech, a person doesn'

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lead to serious problems for

children

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kmibehnaz98Tue Nov 14 2023

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structure

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion which are essential elements of the task. Consider adding a distinct opening paragraph that outlines the topic and a closing paragraph that summarizes the main points and your stance.

cohesion

Ensure that the ideas are logically organized and use cohesive devices appropriately to improve the flow of the essay. Moreover, there's a need to transition smoothly between paragraphs, focusing on establishing clear connections between the main points.

development

Expand on the ideas presented with more specific examples. The inclusion of detailed examples can help in demonstrating the understanding of the topic and strengthen the argument.

relevance

Make sure to directly address the essay prompt in both your introduction and conclusion to ensure a complete response to the question asked. Each paragraph should also clearly tie back to the central topic.

planning

The coherence could be improved by more carefully planning the structure of your essay before writing. This will help with the logical flow and ensure that each paragraph builds upon the previous one.

balance

Address both sides of the argument thoroughly to fulfill the task achievement requirements. This includes covering the potential risks and benefits of having former prisoners talk to students about crime with equal depth.

9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

320 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rehabilitation
redemption
real-life experiences
perspectives
consequences
impact
practical guidance
criminal activities
root causes
prevention
misconceptions
stereotypes
second chances
personal transformation
empathy
forgiveness
support
rehabilitation process

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Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later. Some people think that they are the best people to talk to school students about the danger of crime committing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Logging of the rain forests is a serious problem and it may lead to the extinction of animal life and human life. Do you agree or disagree?

Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

These days, more and more people move away from the area where they were born and brought up when they become adults. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?