The main purpose of public librabries is to provide books and they should not waste their limited resources and space on providing expensive hi-tech media such as computer software, videos and DVDs. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

In
todays
Change to a genitive case
today's
show examples
technology
era, everything is upgraded
day-by-day
Correct your spelling
day by day
show examples
. Some people
claims
Change the verb form
claim
show examples
that the priority of public
librabries
Correct your spelling
libraries
is to serve books
instead
of digital
media
such
as Videos, DVDs and Software.
Library
Add an article
The library
show examples
is
source
Add an article
the source
a source
show examples
of knowledge where people can get everything whatever they want. In my opinion, I
am completely disagree
Change the verb form
completely disagree
show examples
with
this
given statement and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will elaborate
my
Change preposition
on my
show examples
arguments in the
trail
Correct your spelling
trial
show examples
paragraphs. To commence with, one of the most significant
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
is that, in
recent
Add an article
the recent
show examples
era, every people should know about the new
technology
as now not only the exams
are conduct
Change the verb form
are conducted
show examples
by computers but
also
viva and
intervies
Correct your spelling
interviews
interview
are
also
taken by high-tech
media
.
Moreover
, it is enormously help
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
children who belongs to poor family, they can not afford
this
expensive equipment. To put
in
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
in simple words,
learnere
Correct your spelling
learners
learner
can use
technology
from
public
Add an article
the public
a public
show examples
library
Fix the agreement mistake
libraries
show examples
and upgrade
theirself
Correct your spelling
themselves
show examples
.
For instance
, during the lockdown, all
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
went to online classes and
taken
Wrong verb form
took
show examples
exam
Fix the agreement mistake
exams
show examples
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
computers at that time city libraries
were allow
Change the verb form
were allowed
show examples
to use
technology
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
pupils.
As a result
, they were
copmplete
Correct your spelling
complete
completed
their study. Another supportive argument is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
it is
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
privilege
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
that one can complete their work
with in
Correct your spelling
within
show examples
deadline
Add an article
the deadline
show examples
and without time waste.
In other words
, there are hundreds of books on the same topic which made it difficult to decide the best.
However
, without wasting time,
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
can use the computer and they provide all the information which
made
Wrong verb form
makes it
show examples
easy to select
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
one. In
adddition
Correct your spelling
addition
, it is
also
stressless
Add an article
a stressless
the stressless
show examples
job for
librarien
Correct your spelling
librarian
libraries
librarians
to keep digital data
instead
of manual, so they do not need to remember everything. On
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
close scrutiny, I conclude that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
library
Add an article
the library
show examples
should provide expensive hi-tech
media
as it is very helpful and
necessity
Replace the word
necessary
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
all
age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages
show examples
of human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
show examples
as now everything is
depend
Replace the word
dependent
show examples
on
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
inculding
Correct your spelling
including
study, data, information and
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
. It would be
fruitfull
Correct your spelling
fruitful
for all individual who can not
purchasing
Change the verb form
purchase
be purchasing
show examples
this
costly equipment so if
local
Correct article usage
the local
show examples
government provide
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
aminities
Correct your spelling
amenities
than
Correct your spelling
then
show examples
they can upgrade themself
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
hi-tech
media
.
Submitted by vrutikasurani9696 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
Focus on addressing the prompt more directly and clearly. Provide a more balanced argument with developed points and counterpoints.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on structuring your essay with clearer topic sentences and cohesive paragraphs. Use transition words to connect ideas more effectively.
Lexical Resource
Expand your range of vocabulary and use terminology more accurately. Use academic language to express ideas more precisely.
Grammatical Range
Review your sentence structure and aim for greater accuracy in grammar and punctuation. Use a variety of sentence types to demonstrate a wider range of grammar.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!