Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

One of the discussed issues nowadays is free
time
activities for
children
. Some believe that it will be better to give
parents
organize exercises for their
children
. Meanwhile, some think
children
need to choose what they want to do by their self. I think that it will be better if
parents
organised
Wrong verb form
organise
show examples
their
children
's free
time
. Most people at a little age do not really care or think about their future
life
. Because of that, they will spend all their free
time
having fun and do not care about another thing. In that case,
parents
who live more and know more
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
can give
children
the best activities, for having a good and educational
time
.
For example
, in the USA, where
parents
have full control over their
children
's free
time
, science found that they have the biggest level of the public that achieves their aims in the smallest
time
.
On the other hand
, most
children
who choose what to do in their free
time
become independent with other help. That kind of
children
will understand the difficulties of
life
faster than other
children
. Independent
children
nowadays have the highest demand in society and
also
in entrance to university.
Such
as, one of the best university of our
life
Harvard, have one case to enter. How
this
person can be separated
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
To sum up
, all mentioned , I come to the conclusion that
children
who will more believe their
parents
can achieve more and easier, than that childchildren who will do all things in their
life
by themself.
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • balanced development
  • expose children to
  • tailored activities
  • promote discipline
  • foster independence
  • genuine interests
  • free play
  • problem-solving skills
  • emotional well-being
  • unstructured time
  • personal exploration
  • structured activities
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