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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts show the sources of electricity produced 4 countries between 2003 and 2008 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main featuras. and make comparisons where comparisons where relevant

The charts show the sources of electricity produced 4 countries between 2003 and 2008 Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main featuras. and make comparisons where comparisons where relevant
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the charts illustrate the comparison of different sources of
electricity
Use synonyms
 from 4 nations from 2003 until 2008.
overall
Linking Words
, Morocco is the only country that relies fully on using hydropower as their main
sources
Fix the agreement mistake
source
show examples
 of
electricity
Use synonyms
. as
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can be seen, Morocco produced their
electricity
Use synonyms
 mostly on hydropower, followed by Sweden and Vietnam, these 2 countries took up roughly 50% respectively
while
Linking Words
 India has the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
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 percentage with only 15%.
In contrast
Linking Words
, India led the number
on
Change preposition
in
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fossil
Correct article usage
the fossil
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 fuel section with 82%, Vietnam coming second at 56%,
Morocco
Correct word choice
and Morocco
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 and Sweden using
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 similar amount
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 fossil with around 5%. In comparison with Vietnam, Sweden obviously has the highest number on using nuclear power as their source of
electricity
Use synonyms
besides
Linking Words
 hydropower, standing at 44%. there were only 2 countries that utilised nuclear power, the other country is India,
also
Linking Words
 using their nuclear power for
electricity
Use synonyms
although
Linking Words
 they only used 4% of their total proportions

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Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "comparison" was used 2 times.
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