Nowadays a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
There is a trend these days to seek advice from non-medical persons to cure the illness rather than following the doctor's prescription.
This
is not a good development as it can cause more harm than good.
There are many reasons people rely more on alternative medicines.First of all, the cost of medication is too high and so is the consultation fee of the physicians, making it difficult for the patients to bear the expenses.Linking Words
For example
, the price of an injection of chemotherapy is more than one lac rupees in our country Linking Words
whereas
the average monthly income of a common man is less than fifty thousand rupees.So, it is not possible for him to afford Linking Words
such
a costly regimen and he resorts to other ways of healing.Linking Words
Secondly
, there are many side effects of allopathic drugs.There is a long list of adverse effects written on the pamphlets accompanying the leaflets of drugs.Many individuals experiencing the intolerable consequences stop taking the pills at all.Linking Words
Thirdly
, most health professionals have a very busy schedule.Linking Words
This
makes it hard for the sick persons to get an appointment.Linking Words
In addition
, very few specialists give ample time for counselling of the diseased persons which causes an increased rate of non-compliance.All these factors support the idea of looking towards hakims for non-allopathic ways of cure.
Linking Words
Although
it appears fascinating, the non-medical remedies have their own drawbacks.Linking Words
Firstly
, the quacks provide a remedy which is not scientifically proven.There are no randomized trials on these remedies to prove their use.Linking Words
Also
, remedies other than pharmaceuticals may cause the development of untoward problems.Linking Words
For instance
, my uncle had been using various medications by a hakim to control blood pressure.He later developed blood cancer which was attributed to the gold content in those chemicals.Linking Words
Secondly
,the mechanism of action of many over-the-counter items is not known so , if there is an overdose of any of the content, there is no antidote available to nullify its effects.Linking Words
Thirdly
, there is no emergency cure available with Linking Words
such
fake healers.They usually refer them back to doctors for urgent medical conditions.Linking Words
For instance
, a person having a heart attack or trauma rushes to the hospital's emergency for relief. As there are no proper wards for sick people in homoeopathic care, those requiring indoor management have to come to a doctor's clinic for admission.
To summarize, the demerits of alternative medicines are more than their benefits.Linking Words
However
, governments should pay attention to the rising cost of medical treatment and make health reforms for the timely management of ill people in the best possible ways.Linking Words
Submitted by alishah2294 on
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Task Achievement
Try to ensure a clear position throughout the essay. Your introduction should more directly address the question asking whether it is a positive or negative development.
Coherence & Cohesion
For a higher score in coherence, consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between paragraphs and ideas.
Task Achievement
Work on developing both sides of the argument more equally to show a thorough examination of the topic, as your essay leans heavily towards portraying the negatives of using alternative medicines.
Task Achievement
You provided a wealth of relevant examples to support your points, which strengthens your argument and engages the reader.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, making it easy to follow.
Task Achievement
You've done well in concluding your essay by summarizing the main points and stating a clear opinion.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?