In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have dissapeared or are disappearing. What problem is this causing? What measures could be taken to counter this solution?

#parts #world #festivals #celebrations #measures #counter

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It is true that many individuals are forgetting their traditional method of celebrating in many parts of the world. There are various reasons why it is vanishing. In

this

essay, we look at the different causes of

this

issue and provide effective and practical solutions. To commence with, there are three main factors why festival parties have lost their taste in many countries.

firstly

due to

friends with different backgrounds, people in colleges or in the office may get influenced suddenly and start adopting and wearing their way of spending life.

secondly

although

there have been many celebrities who have different religious beliefs because of their lavish lifestyles and different appearances, many young adults find them attractive and have started imitating them, which affects them hugely.

For instance

, there is a famous rapper known by the name of Travis Scott, and because of his fan following, most people consider

Correct pronoun usage

him

show examples

the path to success.

Finally

, seeing different kinds of festivals on TV screens on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

billboard

Fix the agreement mistake

billboards

show examples

may

also

persuade the viewer mentally, and because of that, many started following them.

On the other hand

, even though it is

Correct article usage

a perpitual

show examples

perpitual

Correct your spelling

perpetual

issue, there are many ways to curtail

this

problem. Primarily, there should be a fine boundary between you and your friend, which could be done perfectly by interacting with them professionally.

Also

, celebrities should act as role models and must be alert

Change preposition

show examples

their actions about how they

confronted

Wrong verb form

confront

show examples

them, but at the same time, shows that are televised by production companies should know their impact on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young

adults

Change to a genitive case

adult's

adults'

show examples

minds and their physical shape.

To conclude

, it is a well-known fact that traditional celebration has been removing its steps from one's life. By adopting the proposed solution of promoting balance and boundaries among friends and fine

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

from role models, we can successfully mitigate

this

hurdle.

Submitted by abdulahad08600 on Wed Nov 15 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

The essay needs a clearer logical structure with better paragraphing and connection between ideas. Use clear transitions to guide the reader through your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion

Develop your supporting points further with more detailed explanations or examples to add depth to your essay.

Task Achievement

Ensure you respond fully to the task, including discussing the problems caused by the loss of traditional festivals and specific measures that could be taken to counter this solution. The ideas presented require more directness and exploration.

Task Achievement

Consider providing real-life examples or statistics to support your points and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

306 words

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In some parts of the world traditional festivals and celebrations have dissapeared or are disappearing. What problem is this causing? What measures could be taken to counter this solution?

Fully explain your ideas

You are going to visit the town where your friend went to university. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter: • explain why you will be visiting the town • give details of where you will be staying • ask your friend to recommend some evening entertainment.

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages. If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and, if so, how?

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.