Some feel governments should invest in preserving minority languages, while others feel this is not a good use of resources. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (Write 250 words.)

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In
a
Correct article usage
the
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present day, some people believe that the
government
should more focus on folk
languages
and protect them from extinction by investing,
while
others argue that it wastes
the
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apply
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taxes and
less
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is less
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important than other campaigns.
This
essay will discuss both perspectives and provide
with
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apply
show examples
my opinions.
Firstly
, to preserve the uniqueness of our culture. Minority
languages
are the symbol of
culture
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the culture
show examples
of the country, it shows us the development of our traditions and
languages
. These
languages
are
also
related to
archeological
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archaeological
show examples
, historical and literature
study
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studies
show examples
that will be beneficial for education.
Therefore
, we should preserve them for
next
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the next
show examples
generations to learn the background and
fundamental
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fundamentals
show examples
of our country.
Moreover
, more
expert
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experts
show examples
in local
languages
is
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are
show examples
useful for
government
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the government
show examples
to develop in specific areas
those
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that
show examples
will be beneficial for
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the economic
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economic
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economy
show examples
, tourism and agriculture. Knowing their
languages
, it is easier to negotiate or compromise with the minority communities, they will
more
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be more
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willing to connect with people and more open-minded.
On the other hand
, there are still many projects that the
government
should be priority for investing
,
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in, those
show examples
those
Correct pronoun usage
which
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provide more
advantage
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advantages
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to
the
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apply
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society
such
as public transportation, healthcare and other facilities including education to improve
well-being
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the well-being
show examples
of populations.
For example
, if the
government
develop
better
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a better
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public transportation system, the citizens
are
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will be
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more convenient in
travel
Wrong verb form
travelling
show examples
to any
places
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place
show examples
and more people using
in
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apply
show examples
public transportation
leads
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lead
show examples
to
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
environment, citizens
are
Wrong verb form
will be
show examples
more
happily
Change the word
happy
show examples
to live brings to more efficient in working or studying. In conclusion, investing in folk
languages
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
us to preserve the outstanding
of
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apply
show examples
culture and benefit
for
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apply
show examples
connecting with minority groups. On the other
hands
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hand
show examples
, there are many more important
project
Fix the agreement mistake
projects
show examples
for investing
such
as facility, healthcare and education. And I agree with the attitude that the
government
should not invest in heritage
languages
.
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coherence cohesion
While your essay does have a logical structure, it would benefit from more clear paragraphing, with each paragraph focusing on a single idea or argument. Use cohesive devices to better link your ideas and maintain a natural flow throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present which frames your discussion. However, make sure that your conclusion summarizes the main points and reflects your opinion more decisively to improve the effectiveness of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Although you have supported your main points, you should incorporate more specific examples and evidence to strengthen your argument. This will add depth to your analysis and showcase a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
task achievement
To improve the task achievement score, ensure that you address all parts of the task sufficiently. Your opinion is important and should be clear throughout the essay. The reader should not have to wait until the conclusion to understand your stance. Include examples that are directly relevant to the points made.
task achievement
Your ideas are somewhat clear but could be expressed more comprehensively. Aim to expand on your ideas with more detailed explanations and develop your arguments to demonstrate a greater command of the topic.
task achievement
Utilize relevant, specific examples to support your arguments. These examples should be well-integrated into your discussion and directly linked to the main points you are discussing to improve your score in this area.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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