The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#process #sugar #cane #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The illustration provided displays the

process

Use synonyms

of making

sugar

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from

sugar

Use synonyms

canes

Fix the agreement mistake

cane

show examples

Overall

Linking Words

, is a 7-step and linear

process

Use synonyms

Unnecessary verb

apply

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mainly

man-made

Correct article usage

a man-made

show examples

process

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although

Linking Words

some machines are used in the

process

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, the

process

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begins with growing

sugar

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canes

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and ends with the production of

sugar

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To begin

Linking Words

sugar

Use synonyms

canes

Fix the agreement mistake

cane

show examples

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

planted, which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

takes between 12 and 18 months to grow,

after

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

period of time,

then

Linking Words

is time for harvesting. There are two ways of carrying out

this

Linking Words

activity, it can be done by using cutting tools where human labour is needed or by specialized machines which

collects

Change the verb form

collect

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and store

sugar

Use synonyms

canes

Use synonyms

The next step is

Linking Words

to crush the

sugar

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canes

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, converting them into juice, using

with

Change preposition

apply

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a specific machine.

Following

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, the juice will be purified in a limestone filter, so rests that are not needed are thrown away. Once all juice is purified, it is evaporated to get syrup, afterwards, the syrup

pass

Change the verb form

passes

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through the centrifuge, so

sugar

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crystals are separated from the syrup.

Linking Words

Finally

Add a comma

Finally,

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the

sugar

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crystals are stored in a big metal can, for drying and cooling.

Submitted by elenazheng1211 on Thu Nov 16 2023

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words process, sugar, canes with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

182 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

manufacturing process
sugar cane
harvesting
transporting
factory
crushing
extracting
juice
filtering
impurities
heating
evaporating
syrup
boiling
crystallizing
sugar
separating
drying
packaging
distribution
stage
process

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The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Banking and payment methods. The role of banks in the modern world. Large banks and their work. Working with clients.

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.