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Band 4

Today, many people do not know thier neighbours in large cities. What problems does this cause? What can be done about this ?

#people #thier #neighbours #cities
Nowadays, many
family
Change to a plural noun
families
show examples
 who live in big cities don'
t
 know and meet
thier
Correct your spelling
their neighbours
neigbours
 rarely.
This
all
Add a missing verb
is all
show examples
 because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
 internet and the
separate
Replace the word
separation
show examples
 from
people
 to
people
 in
community
Add an article
the community
a community
show examples
.
This
writter
Correct your spelling
writer
 will give you more information about what
reason
 that make
this problems
Change the determiner
this problem
these problems
show examples
 and give you the best solution for
this
. Starting with the main
reason
Change preposition
for that
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
this
show examples
 was
Add an article
the internet
an internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
, which is very
popuplar
Correct your spelling
popular
 now in the world. And because of it
appear
Change the verb form
appears
show examples
,
people
 don'
t
 talk with each other much in real life,
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
 them
loss
Replace the word
lose
show examples
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 confidence and the skill to talk with
people
 .From that citizens now get separate and get shy when they talk with
other person
Change the wording
another person
other people
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
so that they won'
t
 know
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 neighbours in
large
Add an article
a large
show examples
 city.
Moreover
, the next
reason
 that
make
Wrong verb form
made
show examples
this
cause
Correct your spelling
case
show examples
 was
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 attitude from them.Because they are envious and get cross with
thier
Correct your spelling
their
neigbours
Correct your spelling
neighbours
 so that they will lead a negative effect
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 that family and make them turn into
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 parents. Come up with the other important
reason
 that
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
people
 don'
t
 know
thier
Correct your spelling
their
neigbours
Correct your spelling
neighbours
 in large cities was about
thier schedude
Correct your spelling
their schedule
 and
thier
Correct your spelling
their
work
 time
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 that day.
For example
, if
people
work
form
Correct your spelling
from
show examples
 six to twelve am and one
people
work
 from twelve to five pm .I'm sure they will never meet each other because
thier
Correct your spelling
their
work
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
 are different. What is more , if there
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 one
problems
Change to a singular noun
problem
show examples
 like covid-19,
people
 would get stuck in
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 home and
this
 can be one of the
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
 that makes
them
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 don'
t
 know about
thier
Correct your spelling
their
neigbours
Correct your spelling
neighbours
 in
thier
Correct your spelling
their
neigbourhood
Correct your spelling
neighbourhood
. In my opinion, there are a lot of different
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 that make
this problems
Change the determiner
this problem
these problems
show examples
. But the main solution that
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 can give
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
you
that was
Verb problem
is to
show examples
 use the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
 less
down
Rephrase
apply
show examples
. Practise to
communitcate
Correct your spelling
communicate
 with your
neigbours
Correct your spelling
neighbours
 and
sometime
Replace the word
some time
show examples
 hang out with them,
this
 will help you a lot in
know
Wrong verb form
knowing
show examples
 more about each other and get more confidence to talk with
people
 in real life.
In
contrast
Add a comma
contrast,
show examples
 if
people
 just
work
 on
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 own, don'
t
 know about
thier
Correct your spelling
their
neigbours
Correct your spelling
neighbours
,
people
 will get shy and lose
thier
Correct your spelling
their
 skill and can separate
people
 and turn
this
 community become
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
worse . So as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
real neighbours ,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think you should know more and
sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
 talk with your neighbours so that it can make
people
more happy
Replace the words
happier
show examples
 about each other.

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Support your main points with specific examples and explanations. This strengthens your argument and makes your ideas more convincing.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task by covering both problems and solutions adequately. Provide a balanced analysis of the issues and their potential resolution.
task achievement
Develop your ideas fully to show a clear understanding of the topic. Use a range of sentence structures and vocabulary to convey your thoughts comprehensively.
task achievement
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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