Today, many people do not know their neighbours in large cities. What problems does this cause What can be done about this
In these
days, the relationship of Change preposition
These
people
with their neigbours
is so far in urban cities. The reason why Correct your spelling
neighbours
this
bad situation happened is that too much works
must be done, so they do not have enough time to communicate Fix the agreement mistake
work
to
strangers around their houses. Change preposition
with
This
problem can be solved by arranging timetable
suitably.
The world Correct article usage
the timetable
have
developed fast day by day, the distance between Change the verb form
has
people
and people
is created by busy
of each Correct word choice
the busyness
individuals
. For each person of us, Change to a singular noun
individual
at
childhood, Change preposition
in
people
was
learned that time is compared to gold or silver, so brilliant Unnecessary verb
apply
people
will never waste their time for
doing something Change preposition
apply
make
not Verb problem
that is
profit
for them . Replace the word
profitable
For instance
, many poor families work 9 to 5, after
that they do more extra jobs to help them out of poverty. Correct word choice
and after
As a result
, much
money Correct word choice
the more
the
make, Correct your spelling
they
more
distance is far. Someone else Correct article usage
the more
think
that money is the best and they do not care Change the verb form
thinks
to
their Change preposition
about
neighborhood
or social activities
Change the spelling
neighbourhood
However
, a solution can be found in investing in neighbours
' families going to their house or your house eating meals and chatting together. The most effective approach is to have a good relationship with everyone who lives near their house. If they have difficult work, their neighbours
will help. So, they need to communicate, invest go to parties, by something for themselves. Neighbours
felt happy. They will know their neighbours
in large cities.
Therefore
, they just communicate and do not research, their neighbours
have a bad relationship with them. So we should be chatting and investing in eating meals with them.Submitted by [email protected] on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear structure with identifiable paragraphs. It is important to have distinct introduction, body, and conclusion sections to guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
Several ideas are presented without clear logical connections or transitions. Use a range of cohesive devices (such as connectors, pronouns, and conjunctions) to link ideas, sentences, and paragraphs more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Certain sentences are unclear and the use of punctuations, such as commas, is necessary to improve the readability of your sentences.
task achievement
The essay did not fully answer the prompt as it lacks a thorough exploration of specific problems caused by not knowing neighbours and a variety of solutions. Your response requires further development of these points.
task achievement
The essay needs more specific examples to illustrate the points made. The use of hypothetical scenarios, statistics or real-world examples can greatly enhance the response.
task achievement
Your ideas are not fully developed and articulated. Consider expanding on your thoughts with more details and depth to better answer the question.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.