IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The graph below gives information about Dubai gold sales in 2002

The graph below gives information about Dubai gold sales in 2002
#information #dubai #gold #sales
The chart
illustrated
Wrong verb form
illustrates
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 the data
of
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on
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 gold sales in Dubai in 2002.
Overall
, there was a fluctuating trend in the year. At the beginning of the year, the number started at 200
millions
Change to singular
million
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 dirhams and
then
 increased sharply to 350 million in March. Afterwards, there was a dramatical downtrend and dipped just over 100 million
a
Correct article usage
apply
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bit in July. The data
of
Change preposition
for
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 sales was lowest for the next 3 months and decreased
the
Change preposition
at the
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 same level compared with July in September. In the
last
 3 months of the year, the proportion rose up and down nearly 200 million.
To sum up
, sales were highest in March and lowest in July and September
Submitted by duyuyen18 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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