The charts below shows the percentage of water used for different purpose in six areas of the world.

#percentage #water #purpose #six #areas #world

The pie charts compare the proportion of

water

comsumption

Correct your spelling

consumption

for three

difference

Replace the word

different

show examples

purpose

Fix the agreement mistake

purposes

show examples

in North

America

, South

America

Europe

, Africa, Central

Asia

and South East

Asia

Overall

, the amount of

water

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

used for

agricultural

Correct article usage

the agricultural

show examples

sector

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

up the largest proportion in South

America

, Central

Asia

and South East

Asia

By contrast

, in North

America

and

Europe

, the vast

Change preposition

apply

show examples

majority of

water

is used for

industrial

Add an article

the industrial

show examples

sector

. In South

America

, Africa, Central

Asia

and South East

Asia

water

usage for agriculture

take

Change the verb form

takes

show examples

up 71%, 84%, 88% and 81% respectively. The amount of

water

use

Wrong verb form

used

show examples

for

this

sector

in North

America

and

Europe

is only 39% and 32%. The opposite trend can be seen when we look at

water

Correct article usage

the water

show examples

comsumption

Correct your spelling

consumption

industrial

sector

This

sector

comsumes

Verb problem

consists of

show examples

around 48% and 53%

water

Change preposition

of water

show examples

use in North

America

and

Europe

whereas

the figures for

remaining

Correct article usage

the remaining

show examples

areas are significantly lower, at only

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

5% to 12%. Turning to the household, we can see that the percentage of

water

used for

this

sector

in all zones is

slighly

Correct your spelling

slightly

small. It just

vary

Change the verb form

varies

show examples

from 7% to 19%.

Submitted by ngthao1127 on Thu Nov 16 2023

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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, america, europe, asia, sector with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

180 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

distribution
predominant
variance
agricultural irrigation
residential consumption
industrial processes
environmental impact
economic factors
cultural practices
government policies
sustainability
conservation
trend analysis
resource management
efficiency

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The charts below shows the percentage of water used for different purpose in six areas of the world.

Some people believe that hobbies need to be difficult to be enjoyable. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that music should be taught in schools, while others think that it is best to focus on computer and science. Discuss both views and your opinion.

Women are better at childcare than men therefore they should focus more on raising children and less on their working life. To what extents do you agree or disagree with this statement?

we cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement ?

Manufacturing process of making sugar from sugar scane