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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

New parents should attend parent courses to bring up their children well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, becoming a parent is just getting more complicated than before.
Furthermore
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, modern couples have started considering taking parenting classes before birth to their
children
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. From my perspective, taking the course could be necessary to make the mother and father become more prepared when handling the baby.
To begin
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 with,
parents
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 do play an imperative role in their
children
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's development.
Hence
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, as the first place for juveniles to learn new things,
parents
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 should enrich their knowledge
due to
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 the lack of experience in raising the
children
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.
Therefore
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, taking a parenting class could be the best answer to
this
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 occasion. To illustrate, the class mostly taught us about how to make a bond between
parents
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 and the kids from the beginning of their lives.
As a result
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, when they do have a solid relationship, the
children
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 tend to become good people in the future.
On the other hand
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, we don't really need a formal education about parenting itself since it can be learned either from our
parents
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' experiences or the practical books that already offer the readers adequate examples of how new
parents
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 could nurture their kids in
this
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 modern era.
For instance
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, we could practice what we learned from the books and start to evaluate which parts could be improved in the future because living is all about the learning process.
To conclude
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,
although
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 our
parents
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 could tell us about how they raised us and there are a lot of books which offer the way to nurture our kids, I still believe that taking a parenting class in
this
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 digital era should be a mandatory decision to consider when we are going to have a child.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction clearly presents your stance on the topic, and that the conclusion effectively summarizes your viewpoint without introducing new ideas.
coherence cohesion
Develop each main point with a clear topic sentence, followed by supporting details that reinforce your argument. Be mindful of the flow between ideas and paragraphs, utilizing cohesive devices appropriately.
task achievement
Fully address all parts of the prompt with a well-developed argument. Included examples must be directly relevant and enhance your response.
task achievement
Support your ideas with more specific and detailed examples. Avoid general statements by using precise information, data, or real-life scenarios that can strengthen your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • foundational knowledge
  • child development
  • effective communication
  • healthy eating habits
  • nutrition
  • non-punitive discipline
  • positive family environment
  • stress management
  • safety training
  • support networks
  • encourage independence
  • self-reliance
  • work-life balance
  • cultural sensitivity
  • diverse parenting practices
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