IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In many countries, the amount of rubbish produced is increasing, what do you think are the causes of this, and what can be done to solve the problem?

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These days, the big matter that threat Earth is the trash which amount is climbing rapidly.
This
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 essay
,
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apply
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 discusses the main reasons for
this
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 trend like advertising and tools material;
moreover
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, how we can solve it. The fact
that is
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 really important is that publicity and
quality
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 are the cause of increasing the number of waste. On the one hand, companies across the world advertise their goods a lot, so they encourage the population to follow the fashion
instead
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 of using their old items.
For example
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, when people use social media, they see a majority of the latest methods of clothing and they like to buy these items for themselves rather than wearing their garments that are good.
On the other hand
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, corporations around the world like to earn more money;
as a result
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, the devices that are manufactured by them have poor
quality
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 and people should change their gadgets in the short run. To illustrate, most car companies like TOYOTA decreased the
quality
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 of the material that they use in their vehicles.
This
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 obstacle can be solved by governments. If authorities obtain a lot of fines from the population who is thrown away, they persuade them to generate less rubbish.
In addition
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, the standard organizations should not let the businesses to distribute their substandard goods to the market.
To sum up
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,
this
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 issue is a result of negative fashion among the people and poor
quality
Use synonyms
 of tools.
However
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, when governments encourage the community to use their old items and do not let the corporations sell goods with short lifetimes,
this
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 problem can be solved.

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Task Achievement
Consider revising your introduction to clearly state your thesis. For example, you might explicitly mention both the causes and the solutions in one clear sentence.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses clearly on one main idea. Although you have divided your essay into paragraphs, sometimes the transition between ideas could be smoother.
Task Achievement
Try to provide more specific and relevant examples to support your points. A stronger example could enhance your argument significantly.
Coherence and Cohesion
Be mindful of grammar and word choice, as some phrases can be improved for clarity and precision. For instance, 'the trash which amount is climbing rapidly' could be rephrased to 'the increasing amount of waste'.
Task Achievement
You have identified a relevant topic and made an effort to engage with it directly, which shows your understanding of the issue.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of your essay and suggests a way forward, which is a good practice in essay writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • urbanization
  • throwaway culture
  • convenience
  • discard
  • repair
  • reuse
  • excessive packaging
  • consumerism
  • advertising
  • recycling
  • waste management
  • awareness
  • infrastructure
  • policies
  • industrial growth
  • byproducts
  • sustainable practices
  • environmental impact
  • landfill
  • biodegradable
  • composting
  • circular economy
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