some people agree with spending lots of money on a large wedding while other think it is a wastage of time what is our opinion

#people #lots #money #wastage #time

Some folks love to spend enormous wealth on their special occasions

such

as marriage and birthdays

while

others believe

this

salary should be used for essential purposes.

However

, in my opinion, there should be restrictions on large gatherings to control these kinds of marriages.

This

essay will elaborate on both opinions in detail before framing a conclusion. On the one side, a few folks believe that spending a huge amount of dollars on these events is worth it as

this

can happen only a single time in a life.

In addition

, they believe that the majority of the nation is working hard to make

this

day memorable

as well as

enjoyable. In India,

for example

, the population are not only inviting a large number of relatives but

also

arranging different types of cuisines for them.

Therefore

, they agree to spend a huge money on these occasions. On the opposite side, there is a growing number of the public who are not in favour of

this

show-off

due to

suitable particular reasons. Saving bills to help needy folk can be the most prominent reason for

this

public.

Moreover

, there are a number of nations that don't even have rupees for their basic needs like shelter, health checkups and food,

thus

this

money can help them in their difficult times. 80% of the population,

for instance

, is suffering from starvation

due to

fewer resources.

As a result

, they are suffering from several diseases

such

as malnutrition. To summarize, some crowd opine that spending cash on their weddings would be worth it as these are one-time events in life

while

others believe there are other essential things to do with

this

fund

such

as helping needy human beings.

Nevertheless

, in my perspective, the government should restrict these high-level occasions to save funds and resources.

Submitted by buttargurpinder73 on Fri Nov 17 2023

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coherence cohesion

While the logical structure of the essay is evident, with a recognizable introduction, body, and conclusion, transitions between ideas could be strengthened for improved clarity and flow. Consistency in the use of cohesive devices would ensure that paragraphs and sentences are better linked.

task achievement

The essay meets the requirements of the task in presenting a clear position and arguments for both views and against excessive wedding expenditures. However, ideas would benefit from being developed more fully, with further elaboration or additional examples to support the main points and clarify arguments.

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15Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

301 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

extravagance
financial strain
nuptial
matrimony
opulence
frugality
sustainability
intimacy
lavish
commemorate
milestone
festivities
budgeting
investment
societal norms
materialistic
minimalism
consumerism
practical considerations
economic implications
memory-making

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