IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Nowadays, more people are choosing to live with friends or alone rather than with their families. This trend is likely to have a negative impact on communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Urbanization
Change the spelling
Urbanisation
show examples
 and modern life have presented
people
Use synonyms
 with a number of challenges and decisions.
However
Linking Words
, the number
one
Use synonyms
 challenge is related to housing for citizens.
While
Linking Words
 some opine that most
people
Use synonyms
 tend to live alone or with friends causes serious problems in society, in my view,
although
Linking Words
 living with family plays a crucial role in community well-being, living independently goes a long way toward personal growth. On the
one
Use synonyms
 hand, the fact that parents are important in their children’s lives is obvious to all. They usually act as a role model for their kids and guide them in all chapters of their lives based on their experience. Living with parents enables the young to receive wonderfully effective advice that helps them shape their future and make strong social bonds, leading to a decrease in the rate of depression and anxiety that they may experience
due to
Linking Words
 fast-paced urban life.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, living alone does not necessarily come with many disadvantages. To clarify, in
this
Linking Words
 modern era,
people
Use synonyms
got
Verb problem
have got
show examples
 used to having
one
Use synonyms
 child.
This
Linking Words
 causes a great tendency among the new generation to live with their friends. Aside from providing a great opportunity to spend quality time with like-minded
people
Use synonyms
, it
also
Linking Words
 allows them to learn how to develop an independent life.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
such
Linking Words
 individuals are more likely to address difficulties easily in their adulthood, since they have learned from the earliest years of their lives to rely on themselves rather than depend on others. In conclusion, no
one
Use synonyms
 dares to deny the importance of living together to make a better society to live. I believe allowing children to find their own path and become independent is too important to be ignored.

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task response
Be clear on your view. Say if you agree or disagree with the statement and how far.
coherence
Use clear links to join ideas. Each paragraph should have one main idea and a clear path to the next.
content
Give one or two clear examples to back up your idea. Use simple, real life type examples.
grammar
Fix small grammar and word use. Use short sentences and check verb form and nouns.
structure
The essay has a clear form: intro, body, and conclusion.
content
The writer looks at both sides, not only one side.
coherence
Link words are used to show flow.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Erosion
  • Communal cohesion
  • Geographical dispersion
  • Interpersonal relationships
  • Socio-economic factors
  • Real estate dynamics
  • Psychological well-being
  • Technological facilitation
  • Independence
  • Traditional vs modern lifestyles
  • Intergenerational relationships
  • Virtual communities
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