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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #choices
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Some advocates strongly believe that these days we are overwhelmed with too many options. I vehemently agree with
this
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 assertion
due to
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 the competitive environment around us and the outstanding accessibility that the nations have.
To begin
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 with, some proponents have a belief that competition between companies has provided too many options.
In other words
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, companies produce a variety of goods in order to have a bigger part of the market and try to satisfy their customers
while
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this
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 behaviour bewildered people in their decisions and exacerbated.
For example
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, when folks tend to buy a simple thing
such
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 as soup they face numerous brands with different smells which makes it difficult for them to choose one.
In addition
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, to competition between companies, I strongly believe that the accessibility that nations have gives them too many choices. To clarify, because societies can use the Internet to search for everything that they want to buy and compare them with each other it makes a difficult situation for them to make a decision. Not only can they find out about similar products on the Internet, but
also
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 they can order them from overseas so they have global access to the world.
On the other hand
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, some may claim that communities do not have too many choices. They argue that the environment we surrounded by is just provides us with everything that we need which is a sign of welfare.
Moreover
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, people can have
this
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 opportunity to choose between several options which gives them freedom in their decision.
However
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,
this
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 notion just simply overlooked and they do not pay attention to the obstacles that folks face in their routine life.
To sum up
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, these days the majority of people and I strongly believe that we have too many choices
due to
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 the Internet accessibility and competitive environment that we are living in
while
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 some are of the opinion.
Submitted by mirhashemim7 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central theme that is developed logically throughout the paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to better link ideas and concepts.
coherence cohesion
Check for grammatical errors that might impede understanding and lessen the impact of your examples.
task achievement
Fully address the prompt by presenting a balanced analysis and relevant examples to support your argument.
task achievement
Develop your examples more fully to better illustrate and support your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • overwhelmed
  • decision fatigue
  • paralysis by analysis
  • consumerism
  • globalization
  • personal autonomy
  • market saturation
  • option overload
  • decision-making process
  • psychological well-being
  • buyer's remorse
  • customization
  • trade-offs
  • minimalism
  • information superhighway
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