Young people who commit crimes should be treated in the same way as adults who commit crimes. To what extend do you agree or disagree?t

#people #crimes #adults

this

modern era, youngsters who commit offences should be punished in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

similar ways

Change preposition

show examples

mature people. I do think that younger criminals should

be behaved

Change to the active voice

behave

have behaved

show examples

less strictly than older offenders. In

this

eassy

Correct your spelling

essay

Change the capitalization

show examples

will discuss the viewpoint and give

relevent

Correct your spelling

relevant

ideas about the issue.

To begin

with, young adults are less

matured

Wrong verb form

mature

show examples

compared to adults

this

is why they should not be considered in

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

punishedments

Correct your spelling

punishments

punishment

Furthermore

, sometimes they are more susceptible to being afflicted by bad peers or role models.To make an

exmaple

Correct your spelling

example

, many of them may join

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

aggressive gangs,in which they commit a sort of illegal

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

like; smoking,

teasting

Correct your spelling

teasing

testing

tasting

, hijacking and so on.

Therefore

, the youth should not be punished the same as the grown man who

committing

Wrong verb form

committed

show examples

the types of offensive words.

Besides

, less proper guidance and violations from one's parents can be the main reasons for

youngstars

Correct your spelling

youngsters

young stars

becoming criminals.

In addition

, nowadays parents are often busy with work so that they may be involved with some unwanted crimes like stealing something pen,pencil,

sharpner

Correct your spelling

sharpener

and many more.To explain , punishments must be more flexible for children having

such

backgrounds.

Thus

, in

this

way, it is significant to consider their circumstance and why they inevitably commit crimes. In conclusion, if

youngstars

Correct your spelling

young stars

commit crimes, their lack of responsibility and surroundings should be considered when they are handled by authorities, in order to rehabilitate them effectively. I do believe that age should be considered

while

punishing because it will help in reducing crime in the society in future.

Submitted by badshashaikh840 on Sat Nov 18 2023

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introduction conclusion present

The essay needs clear and comprehensive introduction and conclusion paragraphs to clearly present the topic of the essay and summarize the main points effectively. Ensure the introduction sets up the discussion and the conclusion brings closure, reflecting your position on the issue.

logical structure

You should make use of cohesive devices and paragraphing more effectively to help the reader follow your argument, ensuring each paragraph has a clear central idea and is logically connected to the overall argument of the essay.

relevant specific examples

Expand on your main ideas by providing more relevant and specific examples to support your argument. The use of more detailed evidence will make your points more convincing and will also help to achieve a higher score in task response.

complete response

To fully achieve the task, ensure that you respond to all parts of the prompt throughout your essay. Your response must also fully address the question, showing a clear position and extending your ideas.

clear comprehensive ideas

Strive to present your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. Avoid overly simplistic statements and aim to explain your points thoroughly to demonstrate your understanding of the topic.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

251 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Young people who commit crimes should be treated in the same way as adults who commit crimes. To what extend do you agree or disagree?t

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

Some people think it would be better if the whole family (uncles, aunts, and grandparents) were involved in bringing up children rather than only parents.

You recently attended a cookery class and enjoyed it. Now you want to provide feedback to the cookery school. Write a letter to the cookery school. In your letter: Describe the cookery class you attended. Explain what you enjoyed about the class. Suggest some improvements to the class.