Some people feel that the legal age at which people can marry should be at least 21. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
People suggest that by law, individuals can marry at a minimum
the
of 21. I believe, that 21 is an appropriate Correct article usage
apply
age
to get married as the current generation has much
profound relational experiences.
Fix the agreement mistake
many
Lets
look at it one by one, Replace the word
Let's
Let us
firstly
biologically only at the age
of 25, our brains
'amygdala' Change noun form
brain's
develops
fully. The amygdala is responsible for Correct subject-verb agreement
develop
enchancing
our emotional regulation, cognitive skills and executive functioning. Correct your spelling
enhancing
However
, due to
our exposure to many different experiences and adversities. Research shows that we attain a
maturity by the Remove the article
apply
age
of 20. Personally, I have also
witness
my own Change the verb form
witnessed
friend's
who were 22 -25 Change noun form
friends
got
engaged at the ripe Wrong verb form
get
age
of 21. They lead a beautiful life together which
their partner and mentioned that getting married sooner helped them to Correct pronoun usage
apply
understanding
their differences.
Change the verb form
understand
Secondly
, 21 is an
universal Change the article
a
age
where governing bodies expect you to elect leaders , getting
Wrong verb form
get
automobile
Correct article usage
an automobile
liscence
in some countries and Correct your spelling
license
pursuing
your higher education. I believe that Wrong verb form
pursue
such
crutial
Correct your spelling
crucial
critical
decision making
skills that can push our autonomy Add a hyphen
decision-making
makes
the legal bodies Correct subject-verb agreement
make
to
assign 21 as Fix the infinitive
apply
an
suitable Change the article
a
age
to marry. Moreover
, getting a drivers
Change noun form
driver's
liscence
provided me with a sense of confidence to do things Correct your spelling
licence
license
independantly
.
In my opinion, biological and social factors support Correct your spelling
independently
this
hence
21 is the accurate age
to legalize wedding laws.Submitted by insighttribez on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear logical structure, which makes it difficult to follow the progression of your arguments. It's essential to organize your ideas into clear paragraphs, each with a topic sentence followed by supporting sentences and a concluding sentence.
coherence cohesion
While an introduction and conclusion are present, they are not well-developed. The introduction should clearly state your position on the topic, and the conclusion should effectively summarize your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are supported to an extent, but the support is not consistently clear or elaborated upon. It's important to back up each main point with clear, detailed examples and explanations.
task achievement
Your response is complete, but the clarity and development of ideas could be improved. Make sure you fully address the task prompt and present your viewpoint more comprehensively with well-explained reasoning.
task achievement
It is vital to ensure that your ideas are communicated comprehensively. This includes clearly articulating your thoughts and ensuring that each point is elaborated upon sufficiently.
task achievement
You provided some examples, and while they are relevant, you should strive for more specificity. Concrete examples can strengthen your argument and provide a solid foundation for your claims.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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