Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
While
some are of the opinion that when Linking Words
children
are allowed to make their own Use synonyms
decisions
on everyday matters, they have a high possibility of being selfish, others claim that it is essential for them to make their own choices. In my opinion, I consider that Use synonyms
children
should not be given the Use synonyms
right
to make their own Use synonyms
decisions
.
On the one hand, some Use synonyms
people
think that allowing Use synonyms
children
to make their own Use synonyms
decisions
will cause them to think only about themselves, and I agree. Use synonyms
To begin
with, Linking Words
children
are not mature enough, so giving them the opportunity to choose basic matters, Use synonyms
such
as food and clothes, will tempt them to be selfish. Another point is that if Linking Words
children
can choose whatever they want, they would think that it is their Use synonyms
right
to choose anything, even if it hurts other Use synonyms
people
. Use synonyms
For example
, in most Western countries, Linking Words
children
are trained to make their own choices from a younger age, and because of Use synonyms
this
, some of them put themselves in dangerous situations, especially when they choose the wrong type of entertainment that can impact them morally.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, other Linking Words
people
believe that making Use synonyms
children
choose their own Use synonyms
decisions
on everyday matters will shape them to be great individuals. One reason is that they can enhance their confidence level. Use synonyms
For instance
, if a child chooses something he or she likes, he or she will feel he or she has an opinion he or she can share with the Linking Words
people
around him or her. Another reason is that some Use synonyms
children
face many things in their childhood, and they have to make Use synonyms
decisions
that are helpful for their own cases, especially when they do not have responsible adults around them.
Use synonyms
To sum up
, Linking Words
although
some believe that it is better to allow Linking Words
children
to make their own Use synonyms
decisions
. I believe that Use synonyms
children
need someone to help them make the Use synonyms
right
Use synonyms
decisions
. Parents should, Use synonyms
therefore
, be with their Linking Words
children
whenever they make any Use synonyms
decisions
and guide them to the Use synonyms
right
path.Use synonyms
Submitted by s_syedy on
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task achievement
Ensure that both sides of the argument are discussed equally and comprehensively. Your essay sometimes favors one side, which can make your argument seem biased.
coherence cohesion
Introduce clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your argument. Some paragraphs were lacking a strong topic sentence.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with relevant examples. Most of your assertions were unsupported, which weakens your essay.
task achievement
Provide a balanced conclusion that summarizes the key points from both views and clearly states your position.
coherence cohesion
Work on creating a more logical progression of ideas by ordering them in a way that enhances understanding and engagement.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to create smoother transitions and clearer connections between your paragraphs and ideas.
task achievement
Develop clear, comprehensive ideas throughout your essay, making sure to expand on your points more thoroughly.