IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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Due to
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 the growing competition nowadays, a number of businesses try to seek new competitive advantages over others to gain the capital market, including the debut of innovative products. From my perspective,
this
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 can be absolutely considered a beneficial trend as it eventually contributes to customers' sake. First and foremost, emphasizing newness in advertising is used as a tool to attract customers' attention. To illustrate more, in order to gain public interest, firms have to come up with a new feature or function in some way,
otherwise
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, their goods will be tedious. The presentation they choose to promote in the advertisement is
also
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 a crucial part of highlighting the novelty which is proved to allure the communal attention.
As a result
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 of
such
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advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
, it leads to, apart from consumers' curiosity, an increase in sales and market share as well. As far as I am concerned, the contest among sellers to win consumers' hearts significantly contributes to a huge improvement
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 outputs.
For example
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, in the automotive industry, many brands endeavour to develop advanced functions for better performance. Electronic vehicles can exemplify the transformation in a good way because the trend of eco-friendly among the world's population has been rising these days which is the main reason why numerous automotive brands develop their cars to be powered by electricity
instead
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 of oil.
To conclude
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, it is common in the current society that the majority of companies accentuate the freshness of their products, primarily
due to
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 the competitive ambience and increased public awareness.
Hence
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, in my opinion,
this
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 circumstance will positively contribute to progressive innovations.

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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task achievement
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task achievement
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task achievement
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • emphasise
  • advertising
  • products
  • innovation
  • competitive strategy
  • consumer dissatisfaction
  • value
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