IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

With the rise in popularity of the internet, newspaper will soon become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#rise #popularity #internet #newspaper
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Many
people
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 claim that newspapers will not be read by
people
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 anymore like it was before as the
internet
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 is at its boom. I totally agree with the given statement and the reasons for my agreement will
further
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 be discussed in
this
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 essay.
Firstly
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, The
internet
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 has become very accessible with growing technological infrastructure, meaning that the
network
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 infrastructure
that is
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 developing on a daily basis is allowing
people
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 to join the
network
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 connectivity with mobile gadgets. All these have become important and affordable without which one cannot imagine their daily tasks being completed.
For example
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, even at the store if a person has to make a payment, they are using the
internet
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 to pay the bills using applications on their mobile phones.
Hence
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, we can claim that each person is very much connected to the
network
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 of devices.
Secondly
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, all the
information
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that is
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 supposed to be in the newspaper is right on the
internet
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 but in the form of a digital copy.
In other words
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, the way
people
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 read news in earlier times was way different. They would wait for morning to purchase the newspaper and only
then
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 read the
information
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 related to local, global and other topics. But now, just with a click and every second the data is uploaded and is available to the general public irrespective of the location. All the news or any
information
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 is just available because of
network
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 connectivity.
Therefore
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, we can easily claim that the
Internet
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 is the solution to getting to know about the happenings of the day at any time and anywhere.
Finally
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, I conclude by saying that newspapers are slowly disappearing as the
internet
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 is taking its place. Not only does the
internet
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 provide
information
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 to the
people
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 that the newspaper would have
,
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, but
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it
would
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apply
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also
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provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
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information
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 with updates every second. Henceforth, we must always welcome technology
that is
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 advanced by all means.
Submitted by badshashaikh840 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay lacks complex structures in presenting arguments and can benefit from more variety in sentence structures to enhance readability and flow. Avoid repetitive sentence beginnings and strive to incorporate a diverse range of connectors and discourse markers.
task achievement
Make sure to address the prompt fully by discussing both sides of the argument where necessary, even if you are taking a clear stance. Include a counterargument paragraph to show a balanced view before restating your position.
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