IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 0.5

writing an e-mail like if you are a customer which did one trip to Australia with a agency and respond to agency question given two information about your trip and one sugestion

#e-mail #customer #trip #australia #agency #two #information #sugestion
I am writing in response to your e-mail dated xxx regarding my experience with your agency.
I
Correct pronoun usage
It
show examples
 was an incredible experience, and I could share two highlights about my journey.
Firstly
, I was accompanied by enthusiastic tour guides.
This
 team made my journey even more memorable.
Moreover
, the itinerary was
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
well-structured and allowed the perfect balance between sightseeing and leisure time.
Additionally
, I would recommend providing more detailed information about local cuisine for future
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
. Immerse yourself in the region´s culinary
could
Wrong verb form
arts and
show examples
 make the trip even more interesting. Once again, thank you for your services. Best regards
Submitted by bsb.roberta on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Ensure the introduction clearly sets the tone of the e-mail, and the conclusion wraps up the content effectively.
logical structure
Increase the use of transition words to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs for better coherence.
supported main points
Use specific examples when sharing experiences or suggestions to strengthen your points.
complete response
It is essential to thoroughly address the prompt by providing a detailed response to all asked questions without omitting any aspects.
clear comprehensive ideas
Clarify and expand your ideas for a comprehensive understanding, avoiding ambiguities and general statements.
relevant specific examples
Include more specific and varied examples relevant to the questions asked by the agency to demonstrate a full understanding of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: