A bag containing a valuable company documents that you were carrying has been stolen. write a letter to your manager mentioning; How the bag was stlen. what the bag contained. how important the docs were for your company. what you have done about it so far.
Dear sir,
My name is Asha Patel. I am working in the
account
section of our company as a Senior manager. I am writing Fix the agreement mistake
accounts
this
letter to apologise, as my company's bag which contained some crucial documents has been stolen because of my carelessness.
Let me explain my situation, as I was going home on friday
by my car, I stopped my car at Change the capitalization
Friday
Add an article
a chemist
chemist
shop, as Change noun form
chemist's
i
had to purchase some diabetic medicine for my mother, it only took about five minutes. As soon as I back to Change the capitalization
I
car
and Add an article
the car
i
noticed my briefcase was not in Change the capitalization
I
back
seat. I surely remember that I took it in the back when Add an article
the back
i
left office. It contained paramount reports Change the capitalization
I
of
Change preposition
for
whole
year and Add an article
the whole
a whole
also
laptop
which Correct article usage
a laptop
provide
by Wrong verb form
was provided
company
for Add an article
the company
a company
maintain
and Wrong verb form
maintaining
record
data.
I give you brief details about Wrong verb form
recording
action
which Correct article usage
the action
i
Change the capitalization
I
take
after Wrong verb form
took
stolen
Wrong verb form
the steal
is
I Unnecessary verb
apply
report
Wrong verb form
reported
FIR
Correct article usage
an FIR
in
the police station and surveillance cameras Change preposition
to
are
Wrong verb form
were
also
fitted in Add an article
a chemist
the chemist
chemist
shop. I hope Change noun form
chemist's
police
get some useful Add an article
the police
clue
Fix the agreement mistake
clues
by
that.
I hope that you can forgive Change preposition
from
this
regrettable error.
Yours faithfully,
AshaSubmitted by vrutikasurani9696 on
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coherence cohesion
The letter lacks clear paragraphing, with each point not having its own paragraph, which affects the logical structure.
coherence cohesion
Include a proper salutation at the beginning and a more formal closing at the end of your letter to improve greeting and closing elements.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph presents a single idea for better clarity and readability.
task achievement
Although the task was completed, the explanation could be more comprehensive, providing more detail on each point, such as specific documents lost and potential impacts on the company.
task achievement
The tone of the letter should be more formal considering the recipient is your manager and the situation is serious, including sorry for the inconvenience and explaining any steps for mitigation.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite