A bag containing a valuable company documents that you were carrying has been stolen. write a letter to your manager mentioning; How the bag was stlen. what the bag contained. how important the docs were for your company. what you have done about it so far.

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Dear sir, My name is Asha Patel. I am working in the
account
Fix the agreement mistake
accounts
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section of our company as a Senior manager. I am writing
this
letter to apologise, as my company's bag which contained some crucial documents has been stolen because of my carelessness. Let me explain my situation, as I was going home on
friday
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Friday
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by my car, I stopped my car at
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a chemist
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chemist
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chemist's
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shop, as
i
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I
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had to purchase some diabetic medicine for my mother, it only took about five minutes. As soon as I back to
car
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the car
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and
i
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I
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noticed my briefcase was not in
back
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the back
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seat. I surely remember that I took it in the back when
i
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I
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left office. It contained paramount reports
of
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for
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whole
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the whole
a whole
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year and
also
laptop
Correct article usage
a laptop
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which
provide
Wrong verb form
was provided
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by
company
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the company
a company
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for
maintain
Wrong verb form
maintaining
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and
record
Wrong verb form
recording
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data. I give you brief details about
action
Correct article usage
the action
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which
i
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I
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take
Wrong verb form
took
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after
stolen
Wrong verb form
the steal
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is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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I
report
Wrong verb form
reported
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FIR
Correct article usage
an FIR
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in
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to
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the police station and surveillance cameras
are
Wrong verb form
were
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also
fitted in
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a chemist
the chemist
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chemist
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chemist's
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shop. I hope
police
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the police
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get some useful
clue
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clues
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by
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from
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that. I hope that you can forgive
this
regrettable error. Yours faithfully, Asha
Submitted by vrutikasurani9696 on

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coherence cohesion
The letter lacks clear paragraphing, with each point not having its own paragraph, which affects the logical structure.
coherence cohesion
Include a proper salutation at the beginning and a more formal closing at the end of your letter to improve greeting and closing elements.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph presents a single idea for better clarity and readability.
task achievement
Although the task was completed, the explanation could be more comprehensive, providing more detail on each point, such as specific documents lost and potential impacts on the company.
task achievement
The tone of the letter should be more formal considering the recipient is your manager and the situation is serious, including sorry for the inconvenience and explaining any steps for mitigation.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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